


My Heart is Like a Speeding Train

by TheTiredGeneticist



Series: Healing [1]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: AMELIE YOURE AN IDIOT, Amelie doesn’t know how to gay, Amelie don’t take no shit, Amelie has a heart of gold, Amelie is an idiot, Amélie has a surplus of hugs, And Amélie having a gay meltdown over it, Angela is a wee bit of a jerk, Battle Scars, Couch Cuddles, Dancer and Graffiti AU, Dead gay Gérard is dead, Disney Movies, Emily MIGHT show up, F/F, FOR FOCKS SAKE AMELIE, Feelings? Don't know her -.-, Fireside snuggles, First Meeting, Frickin homophobes man, I am sorry though, I didn't sleep so I wrote something, Kiss de gurl, Lena had a rough time but she's okay, Lena is a heat seeking cuddle missile, Lena is an idiot, Lena literally doing something tiny like setting a mug on the counter, Mentions of homophobia, Now kiss, Physical Therapy, Protective Amelie, SHES VERY SMALL AND SHES HURTING HERSELF, Someone please put a child harness on Lena, Tearful cuddling, There is No Escape, To make a good ship ya gotta break a few lesbians, Two Gay Beans, You thought wrong, Y’all thought I wasn’t gonna break your hearts, angela curse your sudden and inevitable betrayal, flexible Lena, grief and mourning, happy crying, injured Lena, it happened, just a lot of crying, lena needs a hug, mentions of hate crime, mutual pining (for like three seconds), nervous crying, panicked crying, shalalalalala, she doesnt intend to be but she is, sleepy Lena is the purest marshmallow, tearful confessions, there she goooooo, tiny gay Tracer is gay, toll bi Widowmaker is bi, two troubled souls healing each other with the power of love, who knows - Freeform, yeah I’m a horrible person and I am sorry., youre an idiot.
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-13
Updated: 2019-06-02
Packaged: 2020-03-02 15:35:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 25,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18813817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheTiredGeneticist/pseuds/TheTiredGeneticist
Summary: Amélie, a grieving widow who lost far too much after her car was hit by a train, is struggling to pull herself out of her head and learn to live without her husband and her passion.Lena is a lost soul who is fighting herself just as much as the rest of the uncaring, cruel world. She is adrift and longs for something, or someone, to be her anchor.A chance meeting on a midnight train ride changes both of their lives forever.





	1. An Injured Soul Meets a Lonely Widow

 

Ballet didn't entertain Amélie if she wasn't in it. Being in the audience was a poor alternative, but fate had a habit of upending the lives of passionate people. Her life had been full of laughter and love only a year prior, and picking up the pieces, while not impossible, left her feeling like the world was growing pale, losing its colour with every passing day.

She used to just drive home from the many events she was still invited to, galas, ballet recitals and whatever her former colleagues could convince her to crawl out of her chateau to attend. While she felt more comfortable at home she had been "encouraged" to get out more by her therapist, and the loophole she used to avoid as much additional socialization as possible was the subway. It was not always pleasant, but it was usually quiet by the time she got on. She simply kept to herself, read a book, or looked at her phone to pass the time. It often took more than an hour with all the stops the train made, but she was more than used to it by now.

She hadn't enjoyed the ballet recital and was in a less than agreeable mood by the time she settled into her seat, and she would have been content to ignore the few others that shared the commute, and simply read. Fate, however, had other plans. Plans in the form of a short and bedraggled looking passenger that Amélie couldn't remember seeing when she got on, but somehow ended up in the seat next to her without her noticing. She had been less aware of her surroundings than usual, sometimes due to lack of sleep and sometimes distracted by her grief that came and went like the tide.

When she married, she had been _happy_ , if not a little uncomfortable. He was her best friend and they had known each other since middle school, but they didn't quite click romantically. His gaze was more drawn to other men while her interest danced between both genders. He was attractive, she never denied how handsome he was, a good ballroom dancer, and she would even go so far as to say he had been a near perfect husband, or whatever his role had been in their brief marriage. The accident destroyed everything before she had had time to figure out what they were and what they could be. They had been driving too fast, having an argument at the worst time when Gérard tried to beat a train rather than wait up to half an hour for it to pass, which had resulted in disaster. Amélie woke up in the hospital to the doctors delivering two devastating blows to her already injured and drug addled brain. Her husband was dead, had died the moment the train impacted the car, and she had torn several ligaments in her left leg, which meant she would probably never dance again. Everything had been a blur after that. Relatives from both her and Gérard's family had arrived to comfort and console, and she had withdrawn into her chateau as soon as she was able to avoid the press mercilessly shouting their questions. She quickly learned that the only place she could feel some semblance of purpose was the old estate, continuing with the renovations to keep herself busy.

The first thing she noticed, of course, was that there was someone next to her, which found both annoying and perplexing. Why the seat next to her had been selected was beyond her, with nearly the _entire_ railcar's seats available. She didn't look particularly friendly, that had been the point, but this person had decided to sit right next to her regardless. When Amélie looked around later, she realized that the other two passengers were probably the reason. One had been a homeless man she saw on occasion, friendly man but one of the most intimidating people if you didn't know him. The other was either a drunk or not entirely there, rocking back and forth in his seat and muttering to himself. It had dawned on her then that she had been the _safest_ option. The second thing she noticed was that the passenger was female, and _soaked to the bone_ from the rain. Her oversized hoodie was clinging to a body that seemed far too small, and the blue-dyed hair that peeked out from under the drenched hood was stuck to the woman's forehead. She was clearly not a person of wealth like Amélie, her roughed up appearance and the worn out clothing pointed to her being working class or lower. The the third thing that caught Amelie's eye was the _shivering_. Her heart gave an unexpected jolt of pity and concern when she saw the tremors _thundering_ through the tiny body from her head to her feet. It had not been a warm evening and the girl had clearly not evaded the oncoming storm. Perhaps she hadn't had anywhere to go. Her eyes were downcast but Amélie caught the briefest glint of warm amber, when she sneezed and faintly apologized. Her face was soft, and Amélie could easily see why she had caught her eye, she was very, _very_ cute. But it was clear that she was also sick. Eyes dull and tired and slightly bloodshot. Dark rings screamed of sleepless nights. By now Amélie had tucked her book back into her purse, and she prepared to ask if the girl was alright. She wasn't about to leave her alone with two strangers in this state, she looked like she was about to pass out.

Before Amélie could speak, the shorter woman did exactly that, slumping even further down in her seat with a soft wheeze as her head dropped forward, succumbing to her obvious exhaustion and to whatever events had led to her running through a storm in the middle of the night. Another jolt of worry had the former dancer turning in her seat, hands hovering over the hoodie girl's slumped shoulders for a few seconds, unsure if she should touch. When she did, she learned just how thoroughly _drenched_ the poor woman was. The fabric of her hoodie was cold to the touch, when it should have been warm and soft. Her skintight leggings likely did little to fend off the cold that wracked that small body. A few gentle shakes did nothing to wake her, nothing, in fact, proved effective. Amélie was considering taking the girl to the nearest hospital, leaving her with someone more capable, when she felt a weight on her shoulder, followed by faint, _gasping_ breaths against her neck.

The girl’s head had fallen to rest on the former dancer’s shoulder, her soft breaths coming more as shallow huffs now as she slumbered on oblivious. Amélie tensed reflexively and contemplated pushing the girl off or trying to wake her again, until a soft whimper drew her attention. Small hands found their way to wrap around her arm, hugging it to her body and clumsily rubbing her cheek against her shoulder like a drowsy post operation cat. It was weird. And so, _so_ adorable. Her hoodie fell back and spiky blue hair tickled the Frenchwoman’s collarbone, but she didn’t notice or mind. She was not used to being touched, but the thought of waking this poor sleep deprived younger woman would upset her even more. She knew that the girl would miss her stop -for the record she probably did-. Had she even boarded with a destination in mind? Was she simply here to get out of the rain? Amelie's concern was suddenly replaced by a deep, _aching_ loneliness, something she hadn't felt since before the accident. She had not enjoyed another person's company since, finding them either a nuisance or a waste of energy to interact with. This girl, she realized, was so utterly and heartbreakingly _alone_ , she had to be if she was out here at this hour and not asleep in her own bed. _Did she have a bed?_ Did she have someone who missed her? Amelie’s gentle shaking once again didn’t stir her in the slightest- but she was already formulating a plan in her head to house her until morning and drive her home, or at least pay for her to take the train. She didn’t have the heart to free her arm from the girl’s grasp, so she settled and resumed reading as the train car rocked gently and the girl continued to softly snore. Her shivers hadn't died down, if anything they had intensified, much to Amelie’s dismay.

The girl was surprisingly light, much to Amélie's concern. It had been easy to just scoop her up, and even as she walked to the car that awaited her, she didn't feel the slightest bit tired. The girl finally showed some signs of stirring as she was carefully arranged on the seat next to the older woman, her head lifting just slightly before dropping again. She could see long lashes fluttering as she fought to regain consciousness, and despite her valiant effort she failed, head dropping again with another wheeze. Amélie was reaching critical levels of concern bordering on panic. This woman was in bad shape. She was underweight, weak, lethargic, and had been all alone on that subway. She would not have made it off without help. Amélie was amazed she had even managed to make it to the station without collapsing. She needed food and a warm bed, and Amélie could provide both. She _would_ provide both. All she had to do was get the poor girl home.

It wasn't a long ride, maybe twenty minutes, but it felt like hours, especially once the girl began to softly whimper each time they hit a pothole or took a turn at speed. Anything that made the seatbelt pull taut around her torso seemed to cause her discomfort at least and actual _pain_ at worst. Amélie didn't hesitate to add a hospital visit to her growing list. She had the time, after all. The car pulled into the garage at her chateau, and Amélie bade her driver a hasty goodnight as she carried her charge up the stairs and inside. She looked paler. Her brow was furrowed in discomfort as Amélie strode to the unlit fireplace and laid her as gently as she could onto the loveseat that was closest. Tucking a few pillows under that tiny body helped ease her laboured breathing, until Amélie felt she could leave the girl be for a short time, enough to get the fireplace lit and something dry and warm to replace what she was currently wearing.

One of the skills she learned after the accident was how to start the fireplace. Gérard had always insisted on doing it, but he had shown her how, and she was now very grateful as she fetched some firewood from the pile at the back of the chateau. Something about setting the firewood up and strategically placing small crumpled bits of newspaper and other kindling was soothing to her constantly whirling mind, and watching the small sparks turn into a healthy flame gave her a welcome sense of satisfaction. She often spent the night next to the fire, either on the loveseat with a book or even closer, on the bearskin rug with a blanket and a cup of tea. Perhaps she would move the girl to the rug once she was wearing dry clothes so she could benefit fully from the warmth.

She hadn't thought ahead though, not beyond getting dry clothes for the soaked woman, and only realized that she would have to do all of the work if she wanted the shorter woman out of her soaked clothes and into the dry ones Amélie had brought. The realization made her feel more than a little uncomfortable. She didn't even know this woman's name, nor did she have her consent. A sudden, painful series of coughs shaking through the hoodie girl's body was enough to bring the former dancer to a decision, reaffirming that it was preferable to endure some discomfort if the reward was a warm and dry guest that would feel much better when she finally got up.

Moving the smaller woman to the bearskin rug had been a smart idea, and it made reclothing her much easier. Peeling the soaked hoodie off brought with it a feeling of relief, and she didn't hesitate to toss the garment aside to be tended to later. The wet _slap_ of it hitting the floor made her cringe. She couldn't imagine spending any amount of time in anything this wet that wasn't a bathing suit, enduring it while it _chafed_ and sapped the warmth from her bones. Her concern grew tenfold when she saw the tank top underneath, white in colour but pink in some places with what she suspected was blood. Removing the soiled fabric confirmed her worries. The poor woman looked to have endured quite the beating before she got on the train, her stomach and shoulders covered in bruises at various stages of development. The blood turned out to mainly be from several small, shallow injuries, instead of something worse much to Amélie's relief. Nevertheless, she took great care in easing the soft grey nightshirt she had brought over her head, gently pulling her arms into the sleeves. It was too big on her, but it was a vast improvement from the soaked clothes lying on the floor.

The leggings were more of a struggle, clinging stubbornly like a second skin and taking all of Amélie's willpower to not simply grab some scissors and cut them off. It took some doing, and time, but the satisfaction of throwing the cursed garment halfway across the room was worth it. Watching the tremors still rippling through the girl's body slowly begin to ease was an even greater reward. The nightshirt, which went down to Amelie's mid thigh, was almost to the smaller woman's knees and was more than enough to cover her. Now that she was dry, her body began to properly draw in the fire's warmth. She would come down with something, be it a simple cold or a raging fever. She had been cold for entirely _too long_. Amélie could only wait to see how sick she got, and make sure she was able to fight her way through it.

Amélie had planned to sleep on the loveseat, leaving the smaller woman to continue absorbing the warmth of the fire. When sleep would not come, however, she found herself slipping off to settle by the fire, not realizing that she had gently eased the girl's head onto her lap until her hand was buried in the still damp, blue-dyed hair. It was short and soft and _wild_ , and very tomboyish. It was also very cute. It suited the girl. Her shivers had _finally_ subsided, once Amélie covered her with a few blankets. Her breaths were soft but they seemed to come more easily now, and she was sleeping peacefully. Amélie studied the pattern of freckles on the girl's pale cheeks as she ran her fingers through her hair, feeling her exhaustion finally begin to pull at her as she contemplated pulling herself back onto the loveseat. While it was the logical thing to do it would take far more effort than Amélie was willing to give. She let her head tip forward, her eyes drifting shut as she enjoyed the warmth from the fire and the soft hair between her fingers. She didn't realize until later that it was, in that moment, the _company_ she enjoyed most of all.


	2. Compassion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amélie calls her doctor, who turns out to know more about her guest than she expected. Amélie has a choice to make. 
> 
> Or
> 
> Lena being an idiot is literally just a normal Tuesday for Angela. God bless her.

A low rumble of thunder was what eventually stirred Amélie into wakefulness. She was sore, understandable after she decided getting up off of the floor was too much effort. The fire had died away to faint embers, and would need to be fed and coaxed back to life, but it was low on her priority list. Highest on that list was checking on her guest. Amélie slowly sat up, taking a moment to stretch before she carefully moved a few of the blankets to find the smaller woman.

She was still curled up under the small mountain of blankets, and still sound asleep. It was probably for the best, the last thing Amélie needed was for the girl to wake up, panic, and possibly hurt herself. She was already frail and weak as it was, and the stress from waking up in an unfamiliar house wouldn't do her any good.

Amélie doubted she would be showing any major signs of illness yet, it hadn't even been 24 hours, so she was very surprised when she gently laid the back of her hand against the girl's forehead, immediately _recoiling_ from the heat. She had a fever, and a very bad one from the feel of it. If Amélie knew where she had put the box of medical supplies she had brought with her upon moving in she would have taken the girl's temperature, but she was fairly certain that this was not a low grade fever.

She had hoped to at _least_ get the girl up and try to get her to eat before calling her doctor, but a fever this intense was worrying enough to change her priorities. Her phone was still in her bag, and the battery read 43%. Her doctor was one of the few numbers she had on speed dial. She had gotten to know her fairly well, considering the woman prescribed her antidepressants and came to check on the former dancer at least once a week. Her usual check in was two days away, not nearly soon enough. Amélie raised her phone to her ear as it rang, lowering herself to kneel beside the other woman as she waited. If she was lucky the doctor was not away or with another patient.

" _Hallo! You have reached the voicemail of Angela Ziegler, I suppose I am away from my phone, but if you leave your number and why you are calling I'll get back to you as soon as I can! Danke and have a wonderful day!"_

Of course. Amélie sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose between her index finger and thumb. The good doctor was always working.

"Hello Doctor, this is Amélie. I know you're probably busy, but you know I wouldn't bother you if I didn't have a good reason. I met a rather disheveled individual on the train last night. She was in very, ah, unfortunate shape, and I have her here at my chateau. She has developed a very bad fever and I have no way of bringing it down. I am reluctant to move her in her condition and was hoping you could come see her? She also seems to have picked a fight and was out in the rain, so I am very concerned about her wellbeing. I hope you can make the time to look at her, or at least call me back and tell me how to take better care of her myself. _Adieu_ , Doctor."

Amélie did her best to include important information, but she refrained from going so far as describing her. She didn't even have a name to go with and wouldn't until the poor girl woke up. She wasn't even sure if the girl would _want_ her information given.

She sighed and set the phone on the loveseat, checking one last time to see if the fever was as bad as she thought. It was. It was unlikely that her guest would be active or even wake up until she wasn't burning, and until Angela called back there was little to do besides try to eat. She didn't want to move, but her stomach _clenched_ at the thought of food so she complied, after she removed some of the blankets from the small nest. The girl didn't need any more warmth at the moment.

She had been planning to bake a fresh loaf of bread for a few days, but that could wait. Instead of something time consuming she decided to simply heat up some of the soup she had made several nights previous, if only to shut up her stomach. She barely registered the taste, her mind still firmly centered around the smaller woman in the next room. It had been a very long time since she had felt such intense worry and her mind was having trouble processing the emotion. She had been running more or less on autopilot since the accident, with very few breaks in the pattern she had established. This was an immense change to her routine and she was beginning to feel it, though she didn't regret her choices. The girl had needed help, and to provide it had seemed the best solution, despite the fact she had essentially _kidnapped_ the poor girl. It was still a better alternative to leaving her on the train until someone far less compassionate found her and did God knew what. The thought of someone robbing her, or even worse taking advantage of her, all while she was unable to lift her head much less protect herself made the former dancer's blood _boil_. Her soup was left half eaten as she got up and strode as quickly as her injury allowed to begin coaxing the fire back to life. Perhaps burning something would help her relax.

Her phone began to vibrate a few minutes after she sat down, and she didn't hesitate to answer. " _Bonjour_ , this is Amélie." She was a little embarrassed at how quickly she spoke, tripping over her words in her haste, but the good doctor's voice quickly replaced it with relief.

" _Hallo Amélie! I'm sorry I didn't call back earlier, I was with a patient. I have some rather... Specific questions. I have my suspicions, but I want to confirm before I panic and rush over."_

Amélie nodded as the doctor spoke, lowering herself back to the floor. "Of course, doctor. Ask any questions you need to."

There was a shuffling of paper on the other end of the line before Angela spoke. " _I have a close friend who I lost track of last night, after she got into a bar fight. It ended up moving out of the bar and by the time I realized she was not inside, she was gone. She isn't in the best place right now, and I'm very worried. She is in no shape to be on her own. Can you tell me what your guest is wearing?"_

Amélie had folded the girl's clothes and set them next to the fire to launder them later. "She was wearing tights and a hoodie, white t-shirt underneath."

There was silence on the other end of the call, and Angela's voice was trembling slightly when she answered. " _O-okay. What colour is her hair? Is it dyed?"_

Amélie immediately answered, "Yes, it's blue, ultramarine or something close to it. Very short and spiky."

By now Amélie was ready to _demand_ a name, but she politely let Angela ask one last question. By the sound of her voice, slightly breathless, she was already rushing around grabbing her things. The last question was simply confirmation.

" _Check her left ear, does she have two helix piercings?"_

Amélie gently brushed a stray lock of hair out of the way before replying, " _Oui_ , she does. What is her name, Doctor, I wasn't able to find any identification on her."

She heard a door open and then slam, and Angela was now more than a bit breathless when she answered. " _Lena. Her name is Lena. Mein gott, how did she make it to the train station in that storm!? How is she? Has she woken up since you brought her back?"_ She sounded _very_ worried. Amélie could hear her car starting in the background. "She passed out on the train and only briefly regained consciousness in my car, but not long enough to tell me anything. She's very beaten up, doctor, so I assume she didn't win that bar fight. I'll unlock the door for you, just come in when you get here. I will be in the main sitting room."

Angela's hasty goodbye and subsequent hangup left Amélie feeling a mixture of fear and relief as she set her phone down and went to unlock her front door. The girl, Lena, was not only her doctor's friend, but also a good enough friend that Angela had seemingly dropped what she was doing to come and tend to her. That was a huge relief. Angela's worried tone, however, was not. Amélie leaned on one hand and carefully adjusted the pillow she had tucked under Lena's head, more to try to pass the time until Angela arrived than anything else. She was startled when Lena groaned in response to being moved, and she finally spoke, albeit in a voice that was slurred from a mixture of sleep and possibly her injuries.

" _Wuzzzit...? WheramI? Angie...?_ " Oh god she was British. So, _so British_. And she somehow still managed to be cute. Amélie leaned over, feeling a spike of worry when she realized Lena apparently hadn't the energy to even open her eyes.

"Lena? Can you hear me _Chérie_?" She called gently, watching her eyelids twitch in response.

" _Who're you...? Y'aint Angie...?_ " She sounded fainter already, like even this brief moment of consciousness was sapping the last of her strength. Amélie had no idea how she had managed to pick a _fight at a bar_ when she was so weak. "No, I am not Angela but she is on her way. You're safe, Lena. Angela will be here soon."

She wasn't sure if Lena heard her, or if she had slipped under again.

"Lena?"

Nothing. She was unconscious again. Amélie sighed, tucking the blankets a little tighter around the smaller woman, then sat back to watch the fire as she waited for the good doctor.

Time was a curious thing. When Amélie was indulging in something she enjoyed the time always seemed to run out before she knew it, while other times, like now, it seemingly slowed to a _snail's_ pace, the entire world moving entirely too slowly. It was maddening, waiting for Angela and trying not to fret. She fretted more than she cared to admit. By the time she heard the doctor's car approaching she had returned Lena's head to her lap, and was gently running her fingers through her hair in an attempt to calm herself down.

" _Mein Gott_ , what happened to her!?" Angela swept into the room, her eyes only meeting Amélie's for a split second before finding the small body wrapped in blankets.

"She got on the same train as me and I brought her here after she fainted. She woke up a few minutes ago, but she fell asleep again almost immediately." Amélie felt the worry she had been feeling since the train ride coiling in the pit of her stomach, making her feel ill. Angela was here now, but she couldn't help but worry regardless.

"I need to take her temperature, you said she had a bad fever." Angela muttered, quickly fishing a thermometer from the bag she had brought with her. "Lift her arm for me please, so I can place this."

When the thermometer beeped to indicate it had finished, the result was not what Amélie had hoped for. She had dared to hope that, perhaps, she had been overreacting and the severity of the fever was miscalculated. Instead, Angela made a _pained_ sound when she saw the reading, not a good reaction at all.

"A 106.8 degree fever, _Gott_ , she's burning alive. The normal temperature of the average human adult is around 100.7, and fevers usually don't get worse than 104."

The amount of concern radiating off of the Doctor as she rummaged through her bag was thick enough to cut with a knife.

"We need to bring this fever down as soon as possible. Here." She pulled a small bottle lieutenant of her bag, which got her a worried look as Amélie looked at the bottle with concern.

"It's _acetaminophen_ , it's one of the best medications for reducing fever and the only thing I managed to grab on my way here." When Amélie didn't move to take it Angela sighed exasperatedly. "It's _Paracetamol_ , for god's sake, Amélie. It will help Lena fight off the fever." While Amélie didn't like the idea of giving Lena _any_ kind of medication without her consent, she took the bottle. "The normal dosage for adults is two tablets a day but we'll stick to one for now. I doubt we'll manage to get more than one into her anyway, at least while she's unconscious. I can take care of the first dose if you go and see about getting one of the guest rooms ready."

Amélie was nodding while reading the print on the bottle, until Angela finished speaking.

" _Quoi_? You are not going to take her home...?" She asked quietly. If Lena was not well enough to be moved, it made sense not to take her anywhere, but Angela wanted to get her into bed, which meant that Lena probably could be driven home if need be. Was there a reason Angela wanted Lena to remain here? _Perhaps she didn't have a place to stay, or something had happened?"_

"If it isn't too much trouble, yes, I would like her to stay here. Lena mentioned something happening and that she was "travelling" but I know her. She never wants to ask for help. If my suspicions are correct she is stuck between homes and doesn't have one, at least for the moment." Angela sounded so sad when she admitted it, like she had seen Lena go through this more than once. "She needs stability and you've done so much for her already without even knowing who she is. Perhaps having another person here would help you too?"

Amélie was looking down at the girl as Angela spoke. She had become lonely over time, that was true, but she had always figured she could adopt a _dog_ or a _cat_ or something _small_ to occupy her time and help her heal. She had not expected to have a _whole human being_ fall right into her lap, much less a person who obviously needed almost as much care as her. It was _overwhelming_.

"-and I can come check on you both more frequently if you need help. She's stubborn but she shouldn't be a nuisance to.... Amélie?" Angela had been babbling the entire time, but she trailed off as Amélie lost herself in thought.

"You don't have to if you don't think you can. I can take her to my house if you don't feel comfortable having her here. Don't feel like you're obligated...."

Lena was _very_ sick, and Angela was trusting her to take care of the smaller woman despite Amélie's own problems. It was an _immense_ amount of trust being given to her, and Angela never did anything without good reason. Nevertheless, Amélie felt hesitant.

"I know it's a lot to think about, but you care, and Lena needs someone like you right now. She has it in her head that no one cares at all, that she's worthless. Maybe you can convince her otherwise. You certainly went to a lot of trouble to bring her here and make sure she was comfortable." Angela was babbling again. Amélie continued to gently run her fingers through the smaller woman's soft blue hair as Angela spoke, her mind frantically trying to weigh her options and choose the most logical solution.

" _Angie._..?"

Both women jumped as Lena suddenly spoke, lifting her head slightly. The blonde medic was quickest to react, shifting closer and talking to Lena gently as the girl struggled to stay awake. "I'm here, Lena. You're at my friend's home, she found you on the train and brought you here. I need you to take this pill for me, ok? Just one and then nothing else until tomorrow, I promise." Lena was silent, and for a moment Amélie worried she had passed out again, but the girl finally made a small, reluctant noise of acknowledgement, taking the tablet without much fuss. Choking it down seemingly took much of the strength she had left, as she sagged back down into Amélie's lap immediately afterwards.

" _M'sorry, Ange_..." She mumbled, her barely open eyes focussed on the floor as she apologized. What it was she felt she needed to apologize for, Amélie had no idea, and Angela apparently shared her confusion.

"Why would you have to be sorry, Lena? You didn't do anything wrong." Angela's voice was still soft and gentle. Lena's head dropped back into Amélie's lap, "'cause I'm a _mess_...." She sounded weak and faint, but it was the _guilt_ and _dejection_ in her voice that Amélie really noticed. She sounded helpless, and _hopeless_.

"Oh Lena, you're not a mess. Everyone has problems at some point, you've come back from worse. You just need time."

Seeing Lena's breathing hitch as she looked anywhere but her friend's worried face was like looking in a mirror and seeing herself as she was in the first month after the crash. She had accepted that she was not at fault after some time, but for a while she had been convinced that she somehow caused her husband's death. It was a vicious spiral of self-blame and self hatred that she had been incredibly lucky to escape from as quickly as she did. For Lena, however, that cycle seemed to be constant. Seeing the smaller woman so broken down made her decision that much easier. _She wanted to protect her_.

"I will care for her. She can stay as long as she needs." She sounded a lot more confident than she felt. The look of surprise, then _relief_ on Angela's face helped to reassure her that she had made the right choice.

"I'll watch her then, until you get back. Take your time, I don't need you hurting yourself because you rushed." Amélie rolled her eyes good naturedly at the doctor's words as she carefully slid the pillow back under Lena's head, and stood up.

"Thank you, Amélie. You have no idea how much this means to me, and to her."

Amélie simply nodded as she made her way to the door. She wasn't sure she was ready for such an immense responsibility, but the thought of Lena smiling, laughing, and _healing_ filled her with warmth she hadn't experienced in months, something she hadn't realized she missed.

_Perhaps helping Lena to heal would help her heal as well..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My shoddy Internet was determined to stop me from posting but I will not be denied. Here's the chapter y'all wanted, more fluff and a tired Angela who just wants both her friends to heal, maybe fall in love, who knows, a doctor has to entertain herself somehow yeah?
> 
> Ugh italics are becoming my archenemy. 
> 
> As always, comments make my day even more than kudos so keep them coming!


	3. Comfort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angela takes her leave, and Amélie wonders if this is a good idea. She finally speaks with Lena properly and they start off better than she expected. 
> 
>  
> 
> Or
> 
> Angela dumps her kid on a friend and runs off to Vegas (mom of the year everybody) and Lena be preppin' to do Amélie a heckin' good cuddle.

  
“She should be fine, Amélie, as long as she takes the tablets. Once her fever is down all you need to do is make sure she isn’t running off to do something just as stupid as what landed her here.”

Angela had been babbling nonstop since Amélie returned, from reassuring her of her choice to letting her know that Lena had managed some soup and water while Amélie had been preparing a guest room, which took a lot more time and doing than she expected. She hadn’t entered any of the bedrooms besides her own since the accident and the dust had settled thick enough to require cleaning. The bed was fine, and it only took about fifteen minutes to remove the worst of the dust but by the end of it Amélie felt tired and her leg was hurting.

Physical therapy was helping, but in the time it took for her to recover from her other injuries from the crash, and then pull herself out of the black hole of grief and emptiness that followed, she had lost a surprising amount the strength that took years of rigorous training to build. That such a simple chore as dusting left her even the slightest bit out of breath _annoyed_ her.

When she descended the stairs to let Angela know that the room was ready she was a mixture of surprised and relieved to see Lena sitting up on her own for the most part, though she looked like she was about to flop over again if Angela wasn’t holding onto her shoulder.

“ _Wunderbar_! Lena, we have to get you on your feet if you don't want to be carried."

Lena mumbled in reply, making no move to stand up. If anything, she deflated even more. "Lena, please don't make us carry you, Amelie shouldn't be carrying you with a hurt leg." Angela tried her best to persuade, bargain, and even _guilt trip_ the bluenette, but it seemed that nothing was going to get her to move.

"Here, let me carry her, she's very light." Angela looked like she was going to protest until the former dancer easily scooped Lena up. "She barely qualifies as too heavy for me, Angela." She was only half lying. She had barely been able to lift a _pillow_ when she first got out of the hospital, but her strength rapidly returned, thanks to her profession keeping her in near perfect shape. She had, of course, been told to limit herself and gradually allow herself to bear more weight of she felt she was improving. It was no easy task when she was used to carrying full paint cans and ladders around during the renovation. Lena didn't feel much heavier than two paint cans and that was very close to what Amélie knew she could manage. It was just a short distance from the sitting room to the guest room, after all.

As she made her way up the stairs she forced herself to listen to Angela, instead of fixating on the smaller woman in her arms, and how _pretty_ she must look when she smiled. "She can't really act up now, but once she's on her feet she'll be on the move _at all times_. She never could sit still even if she tried. If you need to occupy her just get her some drawing things, she loves to draw, but she could never find the time or money to get an actual sketchpad."

Amélie nodded along as she nudged the guest room door open with her hip, moving to the bed with only the slightest limp and gently laying Lena on the soft sheets. She wanted nothing more than to sit and talk to her regardless of whether she was awake or not, get to know her better and ask her what she needed or wanted. She was not usually one for impulse buying, both for herself and for others, but all she wanted in that moment was to get Lena _everything_ she could possibly want. Clothes, hobby items, books, she was completely prepared to buy _anything_ if it made Lena feel better. It was most likely her self-isolation and lack of socializing that was making her feel the urge to please, to comfort and soothe. She hadn't been especially outgoing even before the crash, and after the accident she had gone from being simply quiet and shy to actively avoiding people as much as she could. She hadn't realized how _starved_ for company she had become in just a few months. Perhaps Angela was right when she said the two of them might benefit from the other's company.

Angela was still talking when Amélie tuned in again. "She'll eat almost anything, she's not picky, but if she isn't sure about something just eat with her. She'll dive in as soon as she sees you eating. She doesn't have a proper sleep schedule as far as I know, so she might be up during the day, she may be padding around at night, but try to make her get at least six hours rest if you can, at least until she's up and about. She'll hate it but don't let her sad-puppy-eye you into letting her have her way. "

Amélie carefully pulled the covers up and over Lena, tucking her in snugly before standing. She really had only one concern, which she voiced to her doctor as soon as they were out in the hall and out of Lena's earshot.

"Will she try to run off? Has she done it before?" It wasn't an easy question to ask, she felt terrible even _suggesting_ that Lena might try to bolt at all. She wanted to _trust_ her.

Angela sighed, and Amélie knew she wasn't going to get the answer she wanted. "She..... has disappeared before. She doesn't trust easily after what happened a few years ago. She doesn't always perceive friendly gestures well and it's hard to convince her that she's wanted. If you're able to reassure her that she's welcome here it'll probably be enough to keep her from trying to disappear again."

 _Make her feel welcome_. Amélie wasn't sure how to do that just yet. She knew so little about the ailing girl that she dared not jump into action just yet. When Lena was awake and actually able to remain so for more than a few minutes, Amélie could learn more about her and what she liked. For now all she could do was provide the most basic of comforts.

Amélie had hoped to talk to Angela about it, to ask about Lena, more specifically about her personality, her life, her hobbies, there were so many questions racing around in her head that she had trouble picking one. She didn't end up asking any of them, however, before Angela's phone buzzed and Angela was being dragged off to the clinic again.

"I'll text you as soon as I can and I'll be back for my usual visit on Friday. I'll bring some things Lena likes, I promise!" She called over her shoulder as she hurried back out to her car. She gave the former dancer a wave and a smile as she got into her car, the wheels kicking up a cloud of dust.

And with that, the good doctor was gone, leaving Amélie with so many questions, and the house with one more occupant than she ever really expected it to hold after what happened.

Lena was probably asleep, and wouldn't like being disturbed, so Amélie sank onto the loveseat in front of the fire, after coaxing it back to life once more. She felt exhausted, sore, confused, and a little nervous. She didn't know how she was going to balance caring for herself, renovating the chateau, and making sure Lena was alright. She hadn't really considered the amount of energy that she would need to commit to her additional responsibility.

The only experience she had with caring for another person was the one and only time that Gerard had fallen ill during their marriage. He had been fine one day, then bedridden the next when a nasty virus swept through his workplace and left him too sick to get out of bed. It had turned out to be nothing more than a nasty stomach bug, but it had taken almost a week before Gerard, normally a strong and active individual, was back on his feet. The entire time she had been at his side, despite his protest.

Perhaps this wouldn't be so different. Lena was sick, but good food and rest would get her up out of bed quickly enough. It was the rest of what Amélie knew Lena would need that worried her. Lena was not just in a funk that would lift after a period of time. She was depressed, very much so, according to Angela, and had been for some time, much longer than Amélie, and it would be an uphill battle for them to get her out of it, if she even decided to _try_.

The thought of Lena suffering through her own personal hell for even a day, much less a few years, made Amelie's heart clench painfully, in a way she was still trying to get used to.

Gerard made her _happy_ , but she never felt any true, romantic love for him. She loved him as one loves a cherished friend, and nothing more. This was not what she had felt when she looked at him, when they had danced or he had made her laugh. That had been a love that filled her with warmth and comforted her, made her feel safe, but not the kind of complete and utter _devotion_ she had thought she would feel. The only time her chest felt as tight and painful as it did now was when the doctor had told her that her husband was dead.

When she had been talking to Lena while she waited for Angela, and when she was carrying her, she felt something that made the love she thought she had with Gerard feel like mere embers of a half spent flame, bright for now but doomed to eventually go out one way or another. This was something else completely. This was an _inferno_ , a blaze that encompassed her entirely and made her abandon her senses enough to take a complete stranger into her home and agree to care for her regardless of her ability to do so.

She hadn't even realize she was exhausted, she was so deep in her own head. She didn't remember falling asleep but she was not surprised that she did, after the morning she had had, and when she woke up the fire was completely dead, the sun was just about to sink below the horizon, and she realized she hadn't gone to check on her guest in _hours_.

She knew she would regret moving so swiftly later, but in the moment she didn't hesitate to _fly_ up the stairs, already berating herself for not checking on her sooner.

Any worst case scenarios and fears that had begun to materialize in the brief time it took for Amélie to get from the loveseat to the guest room, thankfully, turned out to be unfounded. She wasn't sure what she would find when she opened the door, but she was more than happy to take what she got.

Lena looked _just_ as startled as Amélie was, when she opened the door a little out of breath and looking more than a little panicked. The bluenette, who had apparently just woken up and was in the process of taking in her surroundings and trying to figure out just where in the hell she was, _jumped_ when the door flew open, freezing like a deer in headlights.

Her eyes were wide with a mixture of surprise, confusion, and _fear_ , and she looked like she wanted nothing more than to disappear.

Amélie spoke before Lena could recover from her shock and properly panic, and possibly get hurt.

" _Bonjour_ , Lena, I'm Amélie. I'm a friend of Angela's. You're in my home at the moment."

She stumbled over the introduction, but it was sufficient enough, as some of the tension left the smaller woman's shoulders, and Amélie dared to approach until she could sit on the bed and properly take stock of her guest's condition. Or admire her. She could do _both_.

Lena's hair was finally completely dry, spiky and soft looking and somehow even more adorable now that it wasn't wet. It was a very fitting hairstyle, very wild and energetic.

Her cheeks had regained their color, being too pale in Amélie's opinion when she had put her to bed hours earlier.

And her eyes. _Oh god her eyes_. Big and round and so _deep_ that Amélie felt she was being drawn into them, and the warmest amber Amélie had ever had the privilege of seeing. The sun's last few glimmers set them _dancing_ with glints of honey and the occasional fleck of pure gold. _Mesmerizing_ , was the first word she could think of to describe them.

She wanted nothing more than to get lost in them, but she could not allow herself to be selfish. When Lena swallowed and then spoke, she forced herself to listen.

"Uh, heya. Did Angie leave?" She spoke like she thought Amélie would walk out at any second, and like she had accepted it. It was devastating and Amélie decided right then and there that she would have none of it. Wether she was capable or not, she was committed and she was not going to leave this room until Lena knew that she was welcome here and that she was very much  _wanted_.

Lena's eyes had dropped when she spoke, looking at her hands with an expression of exhaustion and the beginnings of sadness. When Amélie reached over and gently placed her hand on top of Lena's, stopping her from picking at the healing scrapes on her knuckles, Lena's breath hitched. Her hands tensed, but she didn't look up, so Amélie tried another strategy. She didn't curl her fingers around the smaller hand, she just let it rest on top, making it very clear that Lena could easily move away if she wanted to. She hadn't, at least not yet, which was a promising sign.

"She only left once she was sure you were going to be alright. She'll be back on Friday to check on both of us."

Lena was still looking at their hands, and Amélie could feel the smaller's clenching and relaxing rhythmically under her own.

"She left me with you? ....why? You don't know me...." She sounded even more resigned, even more _dejected_.

_Oh no you don't, Chérie. Not while I'm around._

Amélie gently squeezed Lena's hand, relaxing just as quickly to give her a chance to pull away if the gesture was unwanted. Lena didn't move. Amélie pushed on, determined to convince her that she was welcome.

"Lena, Angela suggested that you should stay here, at least for the time being, and I want you to know that I'm _happy_ that she made the suggestion. I didn't realize how lonely I had become until I carried you through the front door sopping wet. I'm not upset or annoyed, I'm _happy_ that you are here, even if we are strangers at the moment. I'm happy I got to meet you and help you. You are more than welcome here, you can stay as long as you want."

Amélie wasn't sure if she had said the right thing, or if she had made things worse. Lena was still staring at their hands, unmoving and silent. It was unclear if she was just processing what her host had said or if she felt even _worse_ now.

Amélie didn't want to push, so she withdrew her hand, moving to stand and leave. She only got about halfway up when she felt a small hand catch her own and she looked back to see Lena, having seemingly grabbed for her after realizing she was about to leave. She was still looking down, but she looked like she was thinking very hard about something, so Amélie stilled and waited.

"You mean it?"

It was barely more than a whisper but it broke the taller woman's heart. "Oh, _Chérie_ , of _course_ I meant it. You are more than welcome here, and I very much enjoy having another soul around. Don't be afraid, I _want_ you to stay, as long as that is what _you_ want."

Lena's hand was _trembling_. When she finally looked up the look in her eyes was a mixture of many things. Pain, sadness, frustration, uncertainty, doubt, and the tiniest glimmer of _hope_ , rapidly welling with tears that Amélie hoped were the happy kind.

"Do you want me to stay here, Lena? Keep you company?"

The question definitely seemed to help, Lena was nodding shyly before Amélie finished speaking, and Amelie's heart felt like it was going to _burst_ when the smaller woman even gave her spoken confirmation.

"Till I fall asleep? If it's not too much trouble...?"

Amélie could see the worry and doubt _melt_ out of those honeyed eyes as she sat back down without hesitation, then swung her legs up onto the bed and lay facing the smaller woman, who only managed to meet her eyes for a split second before she focussed on their now intertwined hands and almost seeming to _blush_.

"I won't leave unless you ask me to. I _promise_."

Amélie reassured the smaller woman, and she watched Lena's eyes slip slowly shut again, occasionally fluttering open to check if she was indeed still there, before succumbing to sleep again, her breaths evening out as her grip on Amelie's hand relaxed.

Amélie didn't know if she was ready, or if she was even _capable_ of helping Lena. She wasn't sure if one wounded soul could heal another without pulling both of them down. She didn't know if Lena would let her _try_.

But she had already seen the glimmer of hope, and she was prepared to latch onto it and try to pull this girl with her out of the darkness.

At least, she thought as she felt Lena stir and shift a tiny bit closer to her, she was ready to _try_.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a heads up, the next few chapters are literally just Lena basically doing tiny things and Amélie having a gay overload every single time. Very slow but very cute. 
> 
> I slept nothing in three daysssssss!
> 
> As always, comments are my sustenance and I love reading them! Legend says I love Comments more than Kudos!


	4. Settling In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amélie does her best to make a good first impression, and she and Lena finally have a proper conversation. They both learn a few things about each other. 
> 
> Or
> 
> "I have had this Lena for a day and a half, but if anything happened to her I'd buy an entire art store and smother her in takeout.." Amélie, already whipped AF.

" _Why do my choices make you so upset when you wanted me to pursue my passions!?"_

_"Because I want to see you more than a few hours a week Amélie!"_

_It had been a shouting match the moment they got in the car. Frankly Amélie had been surprised they had made it out of the after party without causing a scene. While she understood her husband's desire to see her more, she also knew that he was being ridiculous._

_"We see each other almost every day! You're making this more of a problem than it needs to be!"_

_Gerard slammed his hands against the steering wheel, nearly sending them into a fishtail and startling Amélie into silence. "Pour l'amour de Dieu! You are my wife! I want to feel like I have a wife!"_

_Their fights had gotten more frequent after she began her professional career in ballet, it was all they argued about nowadays._

_"I know I told you to be happy, but have you ever thought about how I feel! I feel lonely! I miss you! I want to be happy too!"_

_Amélie couldn't help the snort that escaped her lips at that. "That's rich, considering how much you were staring at Francois tonight. I get the distinct feeling you would prefer "spending time" with him, no? At least I don't make eyes at anyone I find attractive, Gerard, one of us has to pretend we are in love!"_

_The car fell silent after that. She knew she had hit a nerve and he had no way to retort. She leaned her head against the window, and the last thing she remembered was declaring that she would be sleeping in one of the guest rooms that night. After that, her memory was blank, but according to doctors and Angela they had reached the railway approximately three minutes after their argument, and she woke up in the hospital days later._

  
———————————————————-

  
Amélie was a light sleeper, had been ever since she was a child. Even before the accident she could be roused by the sound of a pin dropping, and the nightmares hadn't made getting a good night's rest any easier. It came as a surprise when she woke feeling almost rested, and actually confident that she would be able to get herself up and about at a decent hour.

Nevertheless, she remained still, eyes still closed as she slowly cleared the sleep from her mind, along with the unpleasant memories, and became more aware that she had fallen asleep in the guest room. She had fallen asleep _next to Lena_ in the guest room. She remembered there being at least some separation between the two of them when she drifted off, but evidently that was no longer the case. Soft spiky hair tickled the underside of her jaw and her neck, and she could feel Lena's soft breaths ghosting over her collarbone. She could feel the warmth of her fever, even more now that she had _wedged_ herself against the taller woman. One slender arm was wrapped around the former dancer's waist, while the other had tucked itself under her pillow. It was a little awkward, considering Amélie was on top of the covers while Lena was curled underneath them, but Lena seemed comfortable, so Amélie didn't mind waiting for the smaller woman to wake up. She didn't have anywhere to be, after all. She needed to look up the closest art supply store as well as show Lena around, help her settle in, not to mention make sure they both showered, but that could wait.

_What did Lena like to eat? Did she have any allergies? If she did Angela would have mentioned them, right? She wasn't vegan was she!?_

Amélie was rescued from her own thoughts by Lena, who shifted slightly, then suddenly let out a sneeze that made Amélie jump and startled the smaller woman herself awake. Half-open amber eyes blinked blearily at Amélie, more specifically at her chest, before they lifted to her face and seemed to take in her amused expression for a few moments. Lena was, evidently, not a morning person. When she did realize that she had practically glued herself to Amélie during the night she blushed and immediately buried her face into her pillow to hide it.

"Good morning, Lena. It seems we both fell asleep here. Did you rest well?" The questions seemed to fly right over the sleepy bluenette's head, as she blinked a few times. She was clearly still embarrassed, so Amélie relaxed again and, sensing that she wasn’t about to be booted out of the bed, Lena settled right back down.

“Would you like me to make you some breakfast, Lena?”

The smaller woman didn’t move, and Amélie began to wonder if she’d be able to get up before noon at all, when Lena finally managed a bleary nod. “Would you like anything in particular?”

“ _Mmmmmmpancakes_...?” Lena was more asleep than awake, but she seemed to be perking up just a little at the mention of food. It wasn’t much though, and she was clearly teetering on the edge of sleep. Amélie knew that feeding her guest was of utmost importance, she had barely eaten since arriving two whole days ago and had to be _famished_. At the same time, she wanted nothing more than to let Lena sleep and cradle her close until she decided when to get up.

“Do you want anything in your pancakes? Blueberries? I can also do bananas or strawberries.” Lena didn’t seem to understand the question, but she ended up choosing blueberries, and settled back down again after Amélie carefully freed herself. Lena had the resting part of her recovery handled, and Amélie wasn’t sure if she would be able to get the smaller woman up before lunchtime, not that Amélie felt any specific desire to force Lena to get up when she looked so damn _cute_ when she was sleepy.

She only made one detour on her way down to the kitchen, to her room to change. She would shower after breakfast but until then a fresh long sleeve shirt and loose sweats, both black would suffice.

Lena was all she could really think about while she moved around the kitchen, gathering what she needed to make blueberry pancakes for Lena, banana for herself. _Perhaps she should cut up some strawberries too, in case Lena wanted to try them? Did she like whipped cream on her pancakes? Did she HAVE whipped cream?_ She had made pancakes for breakfast almost exclusively since the accident, not really wanting anything else since anything else would be too much effort. Pancakes were simple and tasted good, and she only needed to add small things like fruit to liven the meal up whenever it started to get boring.

She knew that Lena would eat more, at least for this morning, so she decided to make twice the usual amount she made and a little extra. One perk of being a retired dancer was that she could eat whatever she wanted now, no more diets and rigorous exercise. While she missed it terribly, she certainly didn’t miss the strict diet.

She was in a better mood today, most likely due to how well she rested, not to mention how impossible it was to be grumpy when she woke up with the world’s _cuddliest human being._ Any and all nervousness and self doubt were gone, and she was ready to focus all of her time and energy into making her guest feel welcome and comfortable.

Soft footsteps announced the arrival of said guest, who appeared to have been lured down by the smell of breakfast. When Amélie turned she almost dropped the pan she had just been using. Lena was leaning against the doorframe, blinking at her with squinty, half closed eyes as she yawned and began to rub at her eyes to get the sleep out of them. The deep amber was almost _gold_ in the bright morning sunlight. The nightshirt Amélie had given her was hanging off of one shoulder and her hair was halfway between “unacceptably messy” and “gloriously sleep tousled” and she was somehow simultaneously the most adorable thing Amélie had ever seen, and also the most _beautiful_.

It took Amélie a moment to regain her ability to speak. "I'm almost finished. Coffee or tea?" Amelie moved the last of the pancakes onto a plate and transferred them to the kitchen table, "do you like whipped cream or no?" Lena dropped into one of the chairs, leaning back and yawning widely before answering. "Coffee please, and whipped cream's great." She was more mumbling than talking.

Amélie knew that Angela had asked her to care for Lena for a reason. She knew how it felt to be depressed, and she recognized what was happening easily. Waking up in the morning was easily the best part of the day, when one _forgot_ that they had problems for a blissful few hours, before their mind defaulted back into its numb state. Lena didn't seem to have that small luxury, at least not today.

"Here. If you want anything else on them, just ask. I cut up some strawberries and I'll be having the banana ones so don't hesitate to ask for either. I'll just grab the coffee and be right back." Amélie said gently as she set Lena's plate down, feeling a rush of relief when she visibly perked up and gave a soft "thank you" before starting to eat.

Amélie had almost forgotten what it was like to eat with someone, and she hadn't realized how much she _missed_ it. Lena didn't talk much, besides thanking her for the coffee and -much to Amelie's delight- shyly asking if she could try one of her pancakes. The surprised look on her face when she took a bite of banana pancake covered in whipped cream and strawberries was something the former dancer wished she could have taken a picture of. Lena was polite, and as it turned out, she was also very helpful, quietly insisting that she help with the cleanup. Amélie wanted to learn as much as she could about the girl, however, and her softspokenness was making that rather difficult. While Lena was busy putting the dishes away, Amélie was brainstorming ways of coaxing Lena to talk.

Lena seemed a bit _lost_ when they finished, which was understandable. She had no idea what she should do in a place she had never been in before. Amélie didn't want to give her a tour until she was feeling better, which would be a little while yet judging from the tired glaze in her eyes and the way she _swayed_ on her feet occasionally. She needed to take it easy.

"Angela told me you like to draw?" Amélie watched Lena shift on the chair she was draped over, legs thrown over one of the armrests as she soaked in the warm sunlight that filtered into the sitting room. The girl's eyes fluttered open and she glanced over at her host as she skimmed over something on the tablet in her hands. "I'm just looking at some things you might like having." The Frenchwoman clarified, "what size of sketchbook do you like? There are so many, I was under the impression that they all came in the same size."

A lot of the books were very nice and Amélie was genuinely interested in browsing the website for the local art store. She hadn't realized there were so many different facets to traditional art. It almost made her want to start painting again.

"...I haven't really had a sketchbook before. I always just use whatever's available." Lena was very quiet when she answered. She was tugging on the hem of the nightshirt when Amélie looked up, she had to be missing her hoodie, which was currently in the wash. Amélie added a shopping trip to her list of things to do that week. If Lena loved hoodies that much then she would be getting more of them. "You don't need to buy me anything...." She sounded just as dejected as she had yesterday, only this time with a bit of _guilt_ mixed in.

"Lena, I _want_ to get you something to use. You deserve to be happy and comfortable. It's no trouble." Amélie reassured her, and when Lena started to meekly protest Amélie simply shook her head. "Look at this place, Lena. Money isn't a problem, and you look like you could use some spoiling."

Amélie intended to spoil Lena _rotten_. Whatever she liked would be hers the moment Amélie could get it. Anything to make Lena smile. "How does the 24x36 one sound? That's bigger than regular paper."

Lena reluctantly nodded, still fidgeting with the nightshirt. "If you're _sure_ it's not a problem...." She didn't sound convinced. Amélie felt her heart break a little bit. Lena was so withdrawn into herself that she couldn't seem to understand that Amélie wanted to give her something nice. What was she like _before_ what happened? Amélie _desperately_ wanted to know.

"I can go pick it up later today, once I finish the laundry. I imagine you want that hoodie back." Lena visibly perked up, nodding with a small, shy smile. The hoodie was important to her. Another small piece of information that Amélie took and held close to her heart.

Amélie returned her attention to her tablet, selecting a few other things to add to her list, pencils, erasers, and other small things she thought Lena would like. She wasn't expecting the girl to talk, so when she suddenly asked a question it caught the former dancer by surprise.

"Angie said you used to dance...?" Lena looked away the moment Amélie looked up again, fidgeting a little bit, playing with her hair as if she were trying to coax it into a less chaotic mess. "...yes. I was a ballerina. It was my life’s passion until... well....” she trailed off, and Lena glanced up at her. “Until the accident.” Amélie finished finally, after a minute spent gathering herself. “I injured my leg quite badly and can no longer dance.”

Lena was silent while she spoke, only letting out a soft, “oh...” when she finished. She wasn’t like everyone else who knew about the accident. She didn’t push or ask to see the scars, or like layer upon layer of apology onto her. Her sympathy was silent and spoken with her eyes. It was _refreshing_. "But I have other things to occupy my time now. I haven't finished renovating yet, and I want to change a few rooms to suit more recreational purposes."

Lena nodded, and Amélie felt her heart swelling with _affection_ when she realized that Lena had been keeping eye contact since she told her about her accident, not averting her eyes anymore. Lena, unfortunately, seemed to have the exact same realization and quickly broke eye contact, much to the former dancer's dismay.

"How about I show you where the bathroom is, Lena, and you can shower while I finish the laundry?" Amélie didn't want to stop talking to the girl, she wanted to learn as much as she could, but she knew that neither of them would benefit from postponing a shower any longer. Lena nodded in agreement, both to the shower and to getting her clothes back. Perhaps they were the only clothes she had at the moment; the thought was _upsetting_.   
  
When Lena disappeared into the washroom with another quiet thank you, towel draped over her arm, Amélie made her way back downstairs to fetch Lena's clothes as well as her own from the last week or so. Angela insisted that she have routine to keep her grounded and she _hated_ having a full hamper of clothes to sort through. Lena's shirt had taken a bit more effort to clean, what with the blood stains, but she had managed it. It was clean and white again when she pulled it out of the dryer, along with the tights and the hoodie. They were softer than before and Amélie hoped that Lena didn't mind the scent of lavender that clung to the fabric now. She didn't have anything odourless. She carefully folded the girl's clothing and took it back up to the guest room. Her own clothing could wait, she wanted Lena to have her own clothes back when she returned to the guest room. They were clearly very dear to her, the hoodie especially.

She had planned to just set them down and go back to her chores, but as she laid the clothes out a flash of white caught her eye. The hoodie's fabric tag was sticking out from the hood, she couldn't help the curiosity that flared up when she saw writing that wasn't part of the original tag.

" _Wherever you go, I will always be with you, Bluebird. Emily_."

It was a gift then. A very _precious_ gift. Amélie didn't want to pry so she tucked the tag back into the hood and made her way back downstairs. It wasn't her place to ask. Whoever Emily was, it was up to Lena to decide if she wanted to share. She was content with knowing that Lena at least had someone important in her life, even though the thought also made her feel a bit worried. _Did this other woman know where Lena was? Was she looking for her?_

She managed to get the rest of the laundry sorted despite the questions whirling in her head, and she returned to the sitting room, sinking back onto the couch to finish up her browsing and put in her order. Sketchbook, pencils, eraser, coloured pencils (30 pack), pencil sharpener. That about covered the basics and would keep Lena occupied until Amélie knew more about what other things she enjoyed. _Hopefully_. She glanced up as the bathroom door opened and was just quick enough to catch the flash of white and blue as Lena vanished back into the guest bedroom. She finished and submitted her order, and she set the tablet down. It was still early afternoon, plenty of time to have a shower herself and make lunch for the two of them. She needed to ask Lena if she preferred soup or if she wanted something else.

She decided to wait until after her shower to check on Lena, to avoid any awkward accidents. It would certainly make a bad impression to walk in on her guest in any state besides fully clothed.

The warm water did wonders to soothe her muscles as well as her racing mind, and she was able to slow down enough to actually plan out the rest of her day without getting distracted by nagging concerns or wondering about completely unrelated things. She could leave Lena her lunch and go to into town, depending on the time she could not only pick up the supplies she ordered but also purchase additional clothes for her guest. She just needed to ask Lena what size of clothes she wore. She doubted Lena would feel up to going into town with her fever. She could then either return home or stop and pick up some food. Another question for Lena. Did she like Thai or Chinese food? Amélie finished her shower, feeling a little reluctant to step back out, as always, but she managed.

She felt much better once she was showered and in comfortable, clean clothes. She hadn't realized just how _lousy_ she had felt beforehand. She put her still damp hair into a loose braid as she padded down the hall from her room, ready to check on Lena. She hadn't left the guest room but the door was open, so Amélie felt comfortable peeking in. She was glad she was holding onto the doorframe as she would have promptly tripped over her own feet otherwise.

Lena was going to be the _death_ of her if she kept being so cute. She was curled up on the bed, hair back to being weighed down by water though she looked less cold and miserable this time around. She was wearing her tights and shirt, but she was hugging her hoodie and her face was comfortably buried in the worn fabric. Either she was enjoying the new lavender smell, or she had simply missed the hoodie that much, or perhaps it was both.

"Feeling better, Lena?" Amélie spoke softly, not wanting to scare her guest as she leaned on the doorframe. Lena nodded into the fabric, and her reply was so soft that Amélie almost missed it. "Smells nice..." It was good to know that Lena didn't mind the smell. When she peered up over the hoodie, only her soft amber eyes visible above the worn fabric, Amélie felt her heart clenching again. Why was she so shy when she was easily the most _beautiful_ woman Amélie had ever seen!? It took her entirely too long to remember her other reason for being there.

"I'm going to go get some things from town, and I will be gone for a few hours. Did you want anything to eat before I go? I'll be picking up some takeout on my way home. Do you prefer Chinese or Thai?"

Lena softly shook her head no to eating lunch, understandably since she was still sick and hadn't eaten too long ago anyway. She looked a little _crestfallen_ knowing she would be on her own for a bit, but she _brightened_ visibly at the mention of takeout.

"I don't mind, I like both."

 _Be careful what you wish for, Chérie_. Amélie smiled, recognizing another opportunity to spoil the poor girl.

"I don't have a television just yet, but I'll get out my laptop and write down the password so you can use it while I'm gone. It has Netflix and a few other things you might find interesting, but you are free to use it as you please. If you want to look around, feel free to do so, the only room I keep private is my own, the rest of the chateau is open to you."

She continued with the usual ' _there is leftover food in the fridge, take another of those pills in an hour, and don't hesitate to call if you need help_ ' and once she had given Lena her cell number she left her to enjoy some "Lena time." She would be lying if she said she wasn't a little _uncomfortable_ leaving her on her own, but Lena was a grown woman, and she was capable of keeping herself alive for a few hours.

She would be there when Amélie returned. She couldn't wait to see Lena's hopefully happy reaction to the gifts she was about to receive.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got an ear infection so any mistakes are due to me having a head tilt and my exhaustion. I hope I'm keeping their character consistent T^T 
> 
> I'm loving all the comments I'm getting! They boost my confidence as a writer and make me so happy! I'll be diving into writing the next chapter right after posting this one so hopefully I'll have another done soon!
> 
> I love comments more than kudos, so feel free to yell at me!


	5. Realizations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amélie enjoys a comfortable evening with Lena, and realizes her feeling towards her may not be so innocent. 
> 
> Or
> 
> Her mind it tellin’ her noooo but her body is tellin’ her YOU'RE A FOCKIN IDIOT.

Amélie returned to a completely silent house, and a soundly sleeping Lena exactly where she had left her. She had set the laptop down and was curled up on her side, still hugging her folded up hoodie. 

 

Amélie did her best to be quiet as she padded across the sitting room and into the kitchen, trying to avoid crinkling the two large takeout bags in her arms. Lena would most likely wake up once she smelled the food, so there was no reason to rouse her just yet. 

 

The trip had been relatively quiet, besides a run in with a few people she knew, and one particularly _nosey_ couple that she knew from when she was just starting her career. They were the kind of people who spoke to someone _once_ before claiming they had always been friends, using other people to raise their social status. Gerard had never liked them. She had never liked them much either. They weren’t in any way fun to talk to, and they had, as always, tried to invite themselves over to “see what she was doing with the old chateau”. She had already learned from experience that they were more likely to poke around where they were specifically told not to go or try to steal wine or silverware. If they actually showed up she had _no_ plans of entertaining them. She had gotten to the art store and picked everything up without issue, and she had followed through with her decision to pick up both kinds of takeout. It meant less cooking for the next few days at least. 

 

She carefully set The bag with Lena’s things on the counter, well away from the takeout containers, and she was grabbing some plates when Lena sat up and stretched, looking around a bit blearily. Her eyes were scrunched tightly shut for a few moments, her head tipping back just a bit as she inhaled deeply and seemed to almost be trying to figure out where Amélie was based on the smell of takeout. It was another moment Amélie later _wished_ she had captured with her phone. Lena was already so adorable, but ‘I-just-woke-up’ Lena was so _soft_ and it made Amélie’s chest _tighten_ with affection. Amélie didn't want to startle her, so she waited until Lena eventually opened her eyes and found her like a normal human being and made her way to the kitchen before speaking. "Are you hungry now, Lena? I wasn't sure what you liked so I got a bit of everything." Lena's eyes widened almost comically at the selection of food, looking at Amélie and back at the food several times as if she couldn't believe how much there was. Any doubts that Lena would not have much of an appetite vanished when the smaller woman’s stomach let out an impressive rumble for her size. 

 

"Why don't you take first pick while I go grab a sweater. I'm feeling a little cold." It was a lie. She knew that Lena wouldn't want to take first pick otherwise. 

 

Lena, fortunately, did take her pick of the offered food by the time Amélie returned wrapped in a loose sweater. She didn't hesitate to practically _inhale_ her food either, a promising sign. _Any_ improvement, in Amelie's opinion, was worth celebrating. 

 

"I also got your sketchpad and some other things, they're in that bag there." She felt oddly _nervous_ when Lena, after helping with cleanup and packing the leftover takeout into Tupperware containers and returning to the sitting room, finished struggling back into her hoodie and began to look through the bag Amélie offered to her. She was certain that Lena would be quite happy with the gift, but a small part of her still worried. _What if she upset her? What if she didn't think she deserved it?_

 

She couldn't help but watch intently as Lena slowly pulled the sketchpad out of the bag and just _stared_ at it for a moment, before slowly opening it. Her hands were _trembling_ slightly as she ran her fingertips over the blank first page, sampling the texture of the paper. Her expression was difficult to read, and that made Amélie all the more nervous. 

 

"You got all this for me...? _Why_...?"

 

Amélie felt a flash of _panic_ when Lena finally looked up and she could see that her amber eyes were shining with tears. 

 

"Because you're so sad, _Chérie_ , and I want to help you to feel at least a _little_ bit happier, if I can." 

 

_I want to make you smile and laugh. I want to see how beautiful you are when you let yourself be happy, instead of hiding yourself. I want you to know just how beautiful you really are. I want you to feel like you have a safe place._

 

She didn't say the second bit, though she wanted to. She didn't want to risk saying the wrong thing. 

 

Amélie didn't realize she was holding her breath until Lena finally drew the sketchbook to her chest, _hugging_ it to herself tightly as she let out a wet laugh. She sounded both incredulous and, to Amelie's relief, _very_ happy. Amélie felt like her heart was going to _explode_ already, seeing Lena accept her gift, and she wasn't prepared whatsoever for what Lena did next. 

 

"Thank you, Amélie...."

 

She _smiled. She actually smiled_. Not a forced, uncomfortable or strained smile. A _genuine_ , _soft_ and _happy_ smile that lit up her whole face right through to her tear-filled eyes. The whole room felt ten times warmer just from Lena smiling at her. It was like looking directly at the sun but there was only warmth and light instead of burning and blindness. 

 

Amélie forgot how to breathe as she watched Lena start to examine the sketchpad more closely, opening and closing it and almost _wiggling_ in place with contained energy that she had apparently suddenly gotten access to, still smiling as she switched between examining it to just hugging it to her chest. She looked like a child who just got a puppy or a kitten for their birthday, the smile not once leaving her face even as the tears started spilling down her cheeks. The inferno Amélie experienced before was back with a _vengeance_. She wanted to wrap her arms around this precious woman and _treasure_ her smile forever. She wanted to watch her fill that book with her art. She wanted to watch the rain with her on stormy days and enjoy the sunsets with her on the back deck of her chateau. 

 

_She wanted to kiss her._

 

...

 

She blinked. 

 

...

 

Oh. 

 

...

 

_Oh no_. 

 

"Amélie?" She blinked when Lena called her name, and she realized her vision was blurring and her face felt wet. "You're _crying_. What's wrong?" Lena had moved to sit next to her, a healthy foot of space between them as she looked up at the taller woman with a concerned expression even as she clumsily wiped away her own tears. 

 

"I get why I'm cryin' but you shouldn't be. What's wrong love?"

 

She was _so_ British. So British and so _perfect_. 

 

Amélie didn't trust herself to speak without blurting out something stupid, so she just shook her head and tried to calm herself. Deep breaths, just like Angela told her. _Breathe in, hold, and breathe out._

 

She felt Lena putting one hand over hers and _squeezing_. It was so much so quickly. Lena was worried about her. She was more concerned for Amélie than she was for herself. She could feel Lena's warmth when she scooted just a little bit closer. She still had a fever. 

 

"You ok? Y'need a hug?" 

 

_Yes please_. She didn't have the will to speak, so she just nodded, relaxing the moment she felt Lena looping an arm around her shoulders.

 

She felt _disgusted_ with herself. She had no business thinking about Lena, her guest, in that way. Lena was sick, weak, and she was _vulnerable_ , yet Amélie thought these things. She had brought her here to avoid her being _victimized_ and here she was, thinking about kissing her. _What was wrong with her_!?

 

“My best friend’s a gorilla.” 

 

“ _Quoi_?” Amélie was certain she had misheard. When she blinked and looked down at Lena she repeated herself. 

 

“My best friend is a gorilla.” Lena stated as Amélie tried to wrap her head around the claim. She knew that this was Lena’s attempt to distract her, and for the record, it _worked_ , but the statement was so random and unbelievable that it also confused the Frenchwoman. 

 

“You’re joking.” She said weakly, trying to smile and not succeeding very well. 

 

“I ain’t! His name’s Winston! He’s a _scientist_!” Lena argued as Amélie used the sleeve of her sweater to wipe away her tears. “He lives in Gibraltar, he’s a genius! Big goofy huggable guy!” Lena hadn’t opened up this much before and Amélie didn’t argue with her, simply hoping that she’d keep talking. And talk she did. 

 

“He’s working on some really neat stuff! If I had my phone I’d have proof!” 

 

“Perhaps Angela has it, and you can get it back tomorrow.” Amélie felt a _little_ bit better, after Lena’s distraction, but she felt guilty nevertheless. The way Lena stayed close to her and kept holding her hand _certainly_ didn’t help. 

“Wanna watch Disney movies till we get tired?” Lena suggested after a few minutes of silence. Amélie nodded, she didn’t trust herself to speak and she didn’t have the will to just go upstairs and sleep, as much as she wanted to. And spending actual quality time with someone -Lena, especially- seemed the more enjoyable option. 

 

Lena had taken it upon herself to charge the laptop after using it, much to Amelie’s relief. It was one less thing for her to worry about. She only half listened to Lena asking her what she wanted to watch first, nodding to the first option without really recognizing it. She was more focussed on Lena’s hand still over hers, their fingers _intertwined_ comfortably. When Lena settled back onto the couch and scooted right up to her, balancing the laptop on her knees and momentarily setting aside her sketchbook as she set everything up, Amélie gave up on her internal scolding and resolved to simply enjoy the company, at least for the evening. Lena wasn’t uncomfortable, so she shouldn’t assume she was. 

 

Lena, she was quickly learning, was _extremely_ tactile. Touch was almost _constant_ , be it just a brush of their hands or, like now, when she practically _molded_ herself to the taller woman’s side and fit against her like a puzzle piece. While she didn’t particularly like being touched, Amélie could admit that it was _nice_. 

 

They didn’t talk very much, but that was fine. It was nice watching movies she remembered from childhood, despite how old they were. Lion King was still her favourite and she managed to remember most of it by heart, and she was pleasantly surprised by how much the movie was still able to get emotional responses out of her. Lena, it turned out, was very much the same, her head dropping onto Amélie’s shoulder early on as she carefully balanced resting and watching. Amélie diligently refused to let herself put an arm around her, it was such a _cliche_ and this wasn’t a movie theatre. 

 

_Be strong, Amélie_. 

 

Lena was _warm_ , and Amélie let her head rest against the smaller woman’s against her better judgement, not that Lena seemed to mind. When they got to the part she remembered hating as a child, the moment when Mufasa fell and his son spent an agonizing few minutes trying in vain to get help and wake him up, she felt Lena shift a bit and heard her _sniffling_ a bit. It made sense, at least in her head, that this was a good time to try putting her arm around the smaller woman, but she hesitated, at least until Lena softly spoke up, she only needed to say the one word. 

 

“...Hug?” It was so _soft_ that it was probably not _meant_ to be heard, like Lena didn’t expect the request to be granted, which only made the taller woman react all the quicker. Lena tensed slightly, likely a bit startled, when Amélie put her arm around the smaller woman’s shoulders. She settled back against Amelie’s shoulder and squeezed the former dancer’s hand in silent thanks as she sniffled again. 

 

_I will enjoy this_ , Amélie decided, _at least for now. I will talk to Angela tomorrow_. 

 

She wasn’t sure when Lena fell asleep, she only noticed when Lena grumbled and let out a soft snore, and Amélie quickly retrieved her laptop. As soon as the weight on her legs was gone Lena drew them up to her chest, turned her body towards the taller woman and _curled_ into her side. It seemed that they would not be moving. 

 

Amélie was ok with that. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ve gotten so sick that I legitimately thought it had been two weeks since I posted and I panicked. I think this ear infection might be the one that finally kills me.


	6. Battle Scars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lena helps Amélie with her physical therapy, and tells her a personal story. 
> 
> Or
> 
> Angela you FOCK you did that on purpose!!!!

  
Part of Amélie regretted ever telling Doctor Ziegler that she could just come in without knocking. It had seemed the best option at the time, she was usually nowhere near the door and never heard the knocking. Now, however, as she sat on the couch with Lena curled up in her lap, looking up at the doctor like a deer in headlights, she _very_ much regretted that decision.

The doctor was looking down at them with an amused smile, which shifted to something closer to affection as Lena made a soft noise and burrowed even further into the crook of Amélie’s neck.

“I can see you two are already getting along.” The doctor didn’t sound surprised at all. She sounded more than pleased with herself as Amélie weakly glowered at her. She would never admit just how comfortable she was.

Angela set her bag down and was hanging up her coat when Lena stirred and let out a sleepy groan, not ready to be woken up in the slightest, and Amélie was not at all willing to move her. The former dancer had no idea when the bluenette had migrated onto her lap, nor did she understand how she had done it without waking the taller woman. Lena was, despite her delicate appearance, _very clumsy_ and she had no idea how she had managed to get in their current arrangement without rousing her.

“Would you like to eat first? Or shall we get right into things until she wakes up?” Angela eased herself down on the other side of the couch as carefully as she could, evidently just as reluctant to wake Lena as Amélie.

“How is she doing?” The blonde softly inquired, smiling as Lena settled again. “She looks a lot better than she did two days ago, she’s nowhere near back to normal but it’s a noticeable improvement!”

“She was very quiet until last night. We had a proper talk and once I gave her that,” she gestured to the sketchbook sitting on the sitting room table, “she was much happier. We ended up falling asleep here after a few movies. I have no idea how she got into my lap, however.” She didn’t need to mention their little crying session, Angela had already spotted the dried up tracks the tears had left on their faces.

“They were happy tears, Angela.”

 _At least Lena’s were_.

She didn’t want to admit her feelings now, as much as she had wanted to the night before. She knew that Angela would likely figure it out solely based on her body language once Lena woke up and Amélie began falling all over herself trying to make her smile again.

“I brought her phone and most of her things. She was staying with a friend in town and hadn’t even started unpacking yet.”

The news that Lena had other clothes was an _immense_ relief, mostly because it meant she wasn’t as unfortunate as Amélie had worried she was. “She isn’t tight for money, actually. She’s just, well. She’s an idiot. She doesn’t take care of herself as well as she used to, physically and mentally. It’s nice to see her actually having a proper sleep.” Angela’s gratitude was plainly obvious. Her smile was gentle and affectionate as she watched Lena sleep against her caretaker’s shoulder, oblivious.

Lena had money to her name. An even bigger relief, though it raised some questions that Amélie wasn’t sure she was entitled to ask.

“She’s currently getting money for unemployment as well as monthly payments for her military service. Her mental state as well as physical were affected, and she can’t serve anymore, but she would be able to live comfortably if she just pulled her head out of the ground and thought about things like food and rent. She cares more about artwork than more important things, sometimes I wonder how she hasn’t accidentally starved to death.”

 _Military_!? How did someone so fragile serve in any military!? Amélie felt a surge of concern and panic as she tried to remember any scars or injuries that she may have noticed while she was changing her clothes on the first night. Her memory was very blurry, she had been in a state of worry and anxiety which had really not helped things. She did have the nagging feeling that she had spotted something on or around her collarbone, but little else. She didn’t feel comfortable checking or even asking Lena.

“She hates medication, mostly because it either makes her tired or makes her feel sick. This is honestly the best I’ve seen her in a while. What have you been doing?” Angela had pulled out her notebook but wasn’t writing just yet, her appointment was with Amélie, and Lena was her friend, not her patient. Her question was purely personal interest.

“She woke up after you left and was rather crestfallen.” Amélie felt bad, but it had to be said, “she felt like you just dumped her on me and left. I simply reassured her that I didn’t mind her company at all and that she was welcome to stay as long as she liked.”

Angela’s normally bright blue eyes visibly clouded with guilt as the former dancer spoke. She was a busy woman and she had done what she thought was best for Lena in the moment, though she felt guilty nonetheless. Amélie was more than happy to continue, describing Lena’s shy request for Amélie to stay until she fell asleep, and how she had gravitated to the taller woman after she herself succumbed to sleep next to her. That got Angela smiling again, very softly and knowingly. “She was able to get up shortly after, when I was making breakfast. We ate, and she asked me about my career once we were in the sitting room.” Angela looked worried for a moment before Amélie forged onwards, “I just told her that I used to do ballet and explained why I cannot anymore. She didn’t pry further. I looked up a few things you suggested and I got her clothes while she showered.”

“That hoodie is very important to her, I don’t think I’ve ever seen her without it.”

“She fell asleep on the couch hugging it when I left to do some errands in town, including her things there.” Amélie gestured to the carefully laid out sketchbook and supplies that Lena had been fawning over the night before.

“I see you intend to spoil her.” Angela joked which only got her a raised eyebrow and a deadpan expression.

“Of course, she is impossible _not_ to spoil.”

Before the two women could converse further Lena roused herself suddenly and unexpectedly with a breathy sneeze that was just loud enough to startle her awake.

“Good morning, Lena!” Angela greeted her enthusiastically. The smaller woman was startled, but she perked up when she noticed Angela smiling warmly at her. “I’m glad you’re doing well here! I’ve been so worried!”

Lena’s lopsided smile dimmed _instantly_ and she looked down at her hands. “M’sorry Ange. I didn’t think I’d get so roughed up at the bar. I was just angry at something one of those twats said.”

Amélie shot a questioning look at Angela over Lena’s head as the bluenette turned herself to face her friend, while remaining comfortably curled up in the former dancer’s lap. She hadn’t looked at the medic since she started apologizing, looking at her knees dejectedly.

Angela elaborated as Lena crossed her arms over her chest and leaned her head against Amelie’s shoulder, “Lots of the people here are very open minded, but there’s always a few bad apples that cause problems. One of them made a comment about a pair of girls that had just left the bar and Lena took offense, understandably. She was the only one who spoke up, though.”

Lena made a noncommittal sound as Amélie nodded along, clearly uncomfortable until Amélie made a noise of faint _disgust_. “Are people really still making trouble over that kind of thing? I thought that had settled down around 2020.” She genuinely didn’t understand the thought process of some people. She had always been of the opinion that if someone fell in love, it didn’t matter who it was or their gender as long as they were happy. Her father had been less than accepting of anything that wasn’t considered normal, while her mother had handed her a pride flag and smuggled her out to her first Pride when she was 17. If only her father could see her now... She tangled one hand in Lena’s messy hair, trying to distract herself before she got lost down a rabbit hole of unpleasant memories. Lena’s eyes slipped shut immediately and she leaned into the touch like a sleepy cat.

“Do you want me to bugger off till you and Amélie are done? I can go up to the bedroom....” Lena mumbled as Amélie blinked and rejoined the conversation, shoving her own unhappy thoughts aside so she could reassure her guest that she could stay.

“Don’t be ridiculous Lena there’s more than enough room for you to stay down here. Amélie is just going to be doing some stretches to determine if she’s improving. Nothing that requires you to leave.” Angela stopped that potentially discouraging thought before Lena could get hung up on it, instead simply suggesting that she stay and tell her about what they’d gotten up to since she left.

Lena more or less told the same story as Amélie had, as she watched the taller woman gritting her teeth as she stretched. Stretches used to be so easy for her and were done daily when she was still pursuing her career, but now even a year later attempting any kind of stretch that involved her leg caused her a lot of discomfort. Her tendons were protesting after only few attempts.

She felt _useless_ , not as much as she had right after the crash but enough to make her sit back with a dejected sigh.

“Angela, is there a point to this? I’m not improving and it _hurts_.” She said this every time she tried to stretch. It was the truth, she had reached the limit of how much she would recover and they both knew it.

“I know it hurts, Amélie, just a little bit more and then I’ll go.”

“That’s what you _always_ say.” She shot back, pulling her leg away before Angela could try to coax her into one more set of stretches. “If I do any more I won’t be able to walk for days. It hurts too much.”

Angela sighed, and Amélie briefly hoped that _maybe_ the doctor would relent. She could go back to sitting on the couch and pretend that she wasn’t annoyed that Lena wasn’t curled up in her lap anymore and she could go for a walk later to ease her troubled mind.

“Lena, come here for a moment.”

Amelie’s eyes snapped back to the good doctor who had a not-so-innocent smirk on her face as Lena plopped down next to them, looking rather confused.

 _You wouldn’t dare_. Amélie’s glare was ignored and, much to her dismay, Angela only smiled sweetly and promptly used Lena against her.

“Amélie is having some trouble with some of the stretches. You’re pretty flexible, why don’t you try doing them with her?”

It looks could kill, Angela would be a pile of ash on the sitting room floor. As Lena got up to tug off her hoodie and fold it, Amélie could only glare daggers at her doctor, who smiled back with the smugness of someone who knew that the former dancer would never allow herself to show weakness. In a group of dancers at an audition weakness got you _nothing_. She was perfectly fine with complaining when she was the only one doing the stretches.

Lena lowered herself back down and Amélie could only let out a sigh of resignation. It didn’t matter who did better, she would still end up too sore to go for her walk.

“Can you try reaching down and touching your toes, Lena?”

Amélie was feigning boredom while she waited, trying not to look over at Lena unless she had to. “ _Wunderbar_! You haven’t lost any range of movement since I saw you in the field!”

_Don’t look. Do not look. Do. Not. Look._

Lena made a small noise, maybe a grunt of acknowledgement, and despite herself, Amélie glanced over, and nearly choked on air. Lena was sitting with her legs together and straight out in front of her, and she wasn’t simply able to bend over enough to reach her feet. She was practically bent in half.

“Go on Amélie, I know you can still do it.” Angela was _challenging_ her. And she couldn’t ignore that for the life of her. It was a matter of _personal pride_ now.

She was able to copy Lena with relative ease, ignoring Angela’s chattering in the background as Lena turned her head and gave her a shy but encouraging smile.

Amélie felt considerably less angry.

Lena was flexible, and she was good company. Her silent encouragement made it hard for Amélie to just sit back and give up like she had wanted to before. Whenever she got frustrated Lena ended up doing something silly like losing her balance or talking about some funny memories she had with Winston or her other friends. It was becoming impossible to be bored with Lena there.

She ended up completing more of the stretches than she usually did, despite the growing soreness that she felt. She knew that she wouldn’t be going for her walk today or possibly even tomorrow, but she cared more about not giving up in front of her guest more than anything else.

“And every time he tried to get up and yell at me he just slipped and fell ‘cos there was a huge puddle of melted peanut butter on the floor! Winston was banned from every microwave in the building for a year!” Lena was lying on her back as she laughed at the memory, and Amélie couldn’t hold in the smile at the thought of a younger Lena and a gorilla _cowering_ behind an upturned table as her commanding officer slipped and scrambled like Bambi on a frozen pond, red faced and screaming at them. Lena’s face was flushed from laughing and she draped one arm over her eyes, still giggling as Amélie eased herself into the last of the required stretches. It was nothing complicated, she used to preform it multiple times a day. This time, however, it was too much. She didn’t know which tendon gave out but she knew that the sudden sharp pain was the last warning she would get before she tore something.

Angela was already moving closer as she sat up, reading the pain on her patient’s face. “I think we should stop for today. Lena, could you grab some ice and a towel?”

Lena was up in a flash, stumbling slightly on her way to the kitchen. Amélie slowly scooted herself backward until she could lift herself back onto the couch, flinching whenever her lower leg throbbed. She let Angela push her until she laid down, only allowing the doctor to touch her leg to put a pillow under it. Angela was gentle, but she didn’t want to be touched, especially now that she had embarrassed herself in front of Lena.

She had draped her forearm over her eyes and was trying to ignore Angela trying to reassure her, she was just wallowing in humiliation, really, when Lena returned. Amélie was so wrapped up in her embarrassment that she didn’t even know Lena was back until she felt the towel wrapped ice pack under her leg and heard Angela lightly scolding the bluenette for putting it there herself.

“You should have let me do that, Lena, she’s already in pain, we don’t want to hurt her even more.”

Amélie knew _immediately_ that it was the wrong thing to say. She didn’t need to lift her arm to know that the words hit Lena hard.

“I just wanted to...” Lena didn’t even finish the sentence

“ _I’ll just go..._ ”   
  
When Amélie heard Lena start to make her way towards the stairs she gathered the strength to lift her arm away from her face and speak.

“Lena, can I borrow your lap for a few minutes? My head hurts.”

It wasn’t very well thought out, and the last part didn’t even make sense, but it worked. Lena’s footsteps stopped abruptly when Amélie called out, and after a moment’s hesitation she slowly padded back, circled around the sofa, and sat back down so Amélie could rest her head in her lap. She didn’t care how odd the request was, at least not in the moment. She knew that if Lena had made it upstairs she would have just started doing the exact same thing Amélie had been doing, wallowing in guilt. She hadn’t even noticed Lena lifting her leg, and she made it known the moment Lena sat back down.

“You didn’t do anything wrong, Lena. I didn’t even feel you touching my leg, you didn’t hurt me at all.” She reassured Lena until her expression changed from guilt and sadness to relief and only mild disbelief. As long as Lena knew she wasn’t at fault, Amélie was content.

She may have said goodbye to Angela, she didn’t remember, she only knew that the blonde had left at some point, she was there to check on Lena and help Amélie, and she had done both.

In the silence that followed, Amélie’s tired gaze drifted back to Lena’s collarbone, exposed now that the hoodie was off, quickly finding the scar she had noticed before. It hadn’t seemed too serious then, but now she noticed that it was a lot bigger than she expected, starting on her left side and travelling down until it vanished under the white t shirt. Her curiosity was piqued.

“That’s quite the battle scar, Lena. How did you get it?” Amélie inquired, as she leaned her head against the bluenette’s stomach.

When Lena was silent, Amélie dismissed the urge to try to push or apologize. Lena was an adult and she would tell Amélie if the question was too personal.

She was pleasantly surprised when Lena answered, having not been upset in the slightest. “Training accident. I used to be a pilot. Was flying in formation and the guy next to me couldn’t keep to his lane.” She began to run her fingertips up and down the exposed portion of the scar, up and down and occasionally pushing the shirt down enough to expose more of it as it snaked down her sternum. “He bumped me, I overcorrected and next thing I knew I was in the hospital. Other guy ejected and was fine, but I got stuck. Ended up getting pretty messed up.” She didn’t seem upset, perhaps a little _wistful_ , but there wasn’t any sadness in her voice when she continued on.

“Ever heard of a pneumonectomy?” Amélie blinked slowly. She had heard a lot of medical terms and names of procedures but this one was not one of them. “I assume it is something big?” Lena nodded in confirmation as she leaned her head back against the sofa.

“You could say that. Turned out I got a piece of the engine stuck in me during the crash, that’s what made this one.” She pulled the neckline of the shirt down again, this time far enough for Amélie to see that it just kept on going. “It stops right here.” Lena pointed out a spot just under her rib age on her right side. “The shrapnel missed most of the important stuff and they got it out just fine. It didn’t miss the lung though, tore it up beyond fixin’.” She moved carefully as Amélie began figuring out what had happened, doing her best not to jostle the taller woman as she gingerly lifted the left side of her shirt up and pointing to _another_ raised scar that ran under her arm. It was cleaner than the one on her chest and Amélie could make out the faint remnants of stitch-marks along the entirety of the scar.

“They just got rid of it. The doctors said it _might_ recover but they were more worried that it’d just get infected.”

Amélie stared up at her, all traces of exhaustion gone in the wake of that piece of information. When she tentatively touched the surgical mark she felt the muscle underneath twitch.

“I’ve been whining all day about my leg while you’ve been living with _only one lung_.”

Lena just shrugged. 

“I was on the transplant list for a while, but it healed up so they figured it was too risky to try to make it work.” Lena said with a shrug, “I had to quit after that anyway, I tried but I don’t have the stamina for military exercises anymore. Doctors said I’d be fine as long as I don’t run any marathons. I’m okay doing every day things. I got my benefits and I started drawing right after.”

Amélie couldn’t keep the pleased smile off of her face as Lena finished, and her smile only grew when Lena looked down at her in confusion. “What’re you smiling about? Got a thing for scars, love?”

_I most definitely do now._

“You haven’t spoken this much since I met you. I’m just surprised. Most people wouldn’t talk about something like that so easily.”

Lena responded with another shrug, though she was starting to look a bit _bashful_ as she replied, “I loved flying. Love talking about it. And these are _wicked_ scars, I’d have to be _barmy_ to not brag about them.”

She settled back against the back of the sofa as Amélie carefully ghosted her fingertips over the visible portion of the first scar. It was thick and jagged and thinking about how it must have felt made her feel sick.

“You’re very brave, _Chérie_.”

_You’re far braver than me._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my second attempt at posting this after my phone betrayed me. 
> 
> Comments give me life and Thank you all for 100 kudos!


	7. Shift

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time passes, and Amélie is suddenly put in a life or death situation. She makes an important decision. 
> 
> Or
> 
> Amélie almost murders. There Lena goooooo. Fuck those two, never seein them again. Someone please put a child harness on Lena. Or a bell.

Amélie had _refused_ to believe that Lena had been around for a whole month, at least until she checked the calendar in the kitchen. It had felt more like a couple of weeks than an entire month. They had gotten used to each other so quickly and easily.

Amélie hadn't doubted her decision once since the second day, and she treasured every little thing she learned about Lena.

_She's a cat person. She used to prefer dogs, but now dogs just stress her out._

_She likes to run, or walk once she gets too out of breath._

_She hates kale._

_She loves drawing flowers._

_She can be completely silent when she wants to be. She has accidentally scared Amélie more than once._

_She loves peanut butter cookies._

_Giving Lena too much coffee would likely start the apocalypse._

_Lena likes the rain but hates thunderstorms._

_Lena can't swim._

_She doesn't like being alone, but sometimes she can't stand people._

_She hates flying unless she's the one doing the flying._

_She likes banana pancakes better than blueberry._

Lena's presence had become so normal that Amélie could find her eighty percent of the time when she was wandering. Lena didn't leave the chateau without the former dancer, and was usually in her room, in the sitting room, or sitting on one of the many windowsills, completely absorbed in whatever she was drawing.

When Amélie went for her walks, Lena eventually started coming along to keep her company and get some fresh air. Lena was just as uncomfortable away from the chateau as Amélie once she had settled in. She only enjoyed the walks because Amélie was with her. They had bonded to the point of close friendship very early on, once they started talking openly. Lena was only ever quiet when Angela was around. Later on she had confessed with no small amount of _shame_ that Angela, for all her sweetness, often said things that upset her without realizing it. She often spent Angela’s visits in her room once she admitted it.

Their routine rarely varied. They woke up, Amélie cooked breakfast and Lena usually tried to help, they ate, cleaned up, and then they discussed what they wanted to do that day. If it was sunny they spent the morning on the back porch, Amélie watching Lena draw or simply enjoying the sun together. Lena quickly taught her to love morning cuddles, curling up next to the taller woman and sleeping while they soaked up much needed sunlight. Afternoons were spent either watching television (once Amélie actually bought one) or outside exploring the woods behind the chateau.

\---------------------

Amélie looked up from her book when she heard loose gravel on the driveway. Her brow furrowing momentarily. She hadn't expected guests, and with Lena curled up on the couch next to her she didn't want any guests. Lena, who had been lightly napping, sat bolt upright and looked over at the door with a confused expression.

Angela wasn't due to check on them until the next week, no one besides family ever visited the chateau, and her family always gave her at least a few days notice.

"I'll be back in a moment." She _really_ didn't want to get up, but the knocking on the door was loud enough that she knew that pretending they weren't home wouldn't work. If it was who she now suspected it was, she worried for both herself and Lena.

Her worries were confirmed when she opened the door just a crack, carefully schooling her face into a mask of indifference as the couple turned towards her expectantly. They wanted in, as always. Unfortunately for them, they would _not_ be stepping foot inside her home.

“Ah, Louis and Pierre. I don’t recall inviting you, and this is a bad time.” She couldn’t keep the cold edge out of her voice, and she didn’t particularly want to. She was prepared to be as _rude_ and openly _disdainful_ as she needed to be to force them off. With these two that may not even be enough. Pierre was usually the one following his wife’s command, but he was the one knocking today. Louis was the one she was the most worried about.

She knew what they would do, and she was more than prepared when Pierre pushed himself against the door casually, easily stopping it with her own weight and fixing him with a glare. “I _said_ this is a bad time. Please leave.”

“Come now, Amélie, we haven’t seen you in weeks! My wife and I missed you! Can you not set some time aside for your _friends_?” His voice was so thickly layered with what he must think was charm, how he thought it would work was _beyond_ her.

Amélie only barely withheld the urge to slam the door, instead gathering herself to continue her abrasiveness until they left.

“We just want to see how you’ve been doing! The chateau must look wonderful now and- _who is that!?”_

Amélie had been drifting into blissfully ignoring them when she heard Louis exclaim and she knew that Lena had most likely poked her head around the corner after hearing them argue. Lena had already slipped out of sight again by the time Amélie had turned, but she knew the girl was likely listening.

“That is a _friend_ of mine, and _none_ of your business.”

She knew exactly what was coming and she felt utterly _helpless_. She knew full well that Pierre was a raging homophobe, and Louis wasn’t much better. They were _very_ vocal about their opinions and there was _nothing_ she could do to keep them quiet.

“ _Please_ lower your voice. And _stop_ talking about my guest like that. She’s just living with me, nothing more.”

“What is that _boy_ doing in your house? Is he _supposed_ to be here? He looks very ragged.” Amélie barely managed to fight the urge to roll her eyes. She had _just_ mentioned that her guest was a she. “That is _Lena_. She is my friend and I would appreciate you keeping your thoughts on her to _yourself_.” Every word Amelie said was _dripping_ with venom already, the warnings layered on as thickly as she possibly could. It made no difference as usual.

“Why is her hair so short? Why is it _blue_? So _unladylike_! What kind of _trash_ are you allowing into your home Amélie!? She isn’t one of those _queer_ folk is she?” Pierre _drawled_ , leaning a bit harder on the door in an attempt to force it open. Amélie wanted nothing more to slam the door in their faces, before she went out there and gave them a real reason to get as far as possible away from her home. She desperately tried to think of a way to make that happen when Louis also spoke up.

“You’re not the type of woman to stoop so _low_ as to allow a _queer_ into your house! You need to _remove_ that filthy girl!”

If those words didn’t make Amélie see red, the soft, _pained_ gasp behind her and rapid footsteps fading away certainly did. Lena was _not_ to be hurt in any way and Amélie could no longer care less about the two vile people trying to push their way inside. She opened the door just a bit more, and as Pierre stepped to move inside she grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and _yanked_ him forward to growl directly into his stunned face.

“You listen to me, _fils de pute_ , if you _ever_ talk about Lena like that again, I will personally guarantee that you and your _disgusting_ wife suffer. Lena is my _friend_ , and you are _nothing_ to me. If anyone is trash here it is _you_. Get off my property, _now_. If you _ever_ come back here you will regret it.” She wanted to _wring_ his scrawny neck. She was so disgusted and enraged that she felt dizzy. She wanted to _hurt_ them. Lena hadn’t done anything at all.

When they couple stood gobsmacked for a moment longer than she liked, their faces pale from shock, she decided that if they didn’t move when she opened the door, she would hurt them. She didn’t know how, but she _would_.

She didn’t have to go that far, fortunately. The moment she flung the door open they seemed to regain their senses and scrambled to get back to their car, utterly terrified of the fuming woman that looked like she was about to start _breathing fire_.

Once they had peeled out of her driveway and vanished back the way they had come hopefully never to return, Amélie slammed the door with a _hiss_ of rage and frustration. Lena was already so quick to believe she was worthless and this was exactly what she feared would happen sooner or later. She had known Lena was gay early on when she saw the tag on her hoodie, and Angela had mentioned it as well, she had never had the chance to tell the girl that she had absolutely no problem with it. She should have told her early on, when she first found out. She could have prevented this if only she hadn’t forgotten.

As Amélie called for Lena, and got no reply, she came to a horrifying realization.

 _Lena wasn’t in the chateau_. The realization terrified her. Searching everywhere, her room, the sitting room, everywhere she usually liked to spend her time yielded nothing. The rest of the rooms were empty as well. She found the back door slightly ajar. Her blood ran _cold_. It was autumn, getting close to winter. Lena had left her hoodie on the couch. She wouldn’t be able to keep herself warm, especially after nightfall. The sun was starting to set.

Amélie knocked over the coat stand as she blew past and grabbed her jacket, not caring as it crashed to the floor. Lena wouldn’t be able to run for long but she was one of the _fastest_ people Amelie had ever seen. If she ran until she dropped she would _still_ make it fairly far.

It was already cold out, and the wind made it even colder, the few leaves still clinging to the trees rattling against the branches. Amélie knew that Lena would _freeze_ if she didn’t find her. The thought of the smaller woman succumbing to the cold all alone and afraid in the middle of the forest spurred her forward at ever increasing speed.

When the _screaming_ started, faint and distant but very clearly Lena, Amélie got her first glimpse of hope. She was alive, but she was either screaming from her emotional distress or she was in actual _pain_. She didn’t want to pray for either. The screams were raw and her chest tightened as she half ran, half trotted towards them. Lena was far, but at least she didn’t seem to be moving even further away. The sun sank ever lower as Amélie followed the cries.

It had been _hours_ , and the sun began to dip below the horizon when the screams stopped suddenly and Amelie’s heart froze for a moment. _Why had she stopped?_ She didn’t want to think about why. She began to move more aimlessly without the sound to guide her, but she was close. The screaming had died down to more of a pained wail at the end, as though Lena was running out of strength. She probably _was_.

It was almost too dark to see when Amélie finally spotted something as she emerged into a small break in the trees. On the other side of the clearing, crumpled under a giant oak tree, was a small blue and white shape. Her heart almost stopped.

“ _Lena_!” Amélie felt her blood turning to ice when the crumpled form didn’t move, and she forced her burning legs to move faster. She _had_ to get to Lena. Lena was _all_ that mattered. She would have _flown_ up the hill had her leg not been threatening to buckle.

Lena must have been so upset that she ran until her legs gave out. She had to have pushed herself too hard to have made it this far. She was shivering, but only _tiny_ tremors. She had to be so cold without her hoodie. She was so _pale_. She most likely dropped exactly as she was, and passed out shortly after. She had to have been so _blinded_ by her emotions to have pushed herself so hard. Her arms were covered in tiny cuts where she had been struck by branches as she ran.

Amélie’s voice failed her as she dropped to her knees and gathered Lena’s tiny, frail body into her arms, tears beginning to burn her eyes as Lena’s head fell back, completely lifeless. Her lips were almost _blue_ from the cold. Tiny puffs of breath escaping them were the only trace of life left in her.

“I’m so sorry Lena, _I’m so sorry_...” she choked. Lena was so _fragile_ and she was so _limp_ , so _cold_. Amélie’s heart clenched painfully when she noticed that her ear had some blood on it. One of the piercings must have caught on something while she was running.

She _needed_ to get her back to the chateau. Amélie only remained sitting long enough to shrug off her coat and wrap it around Lena’s body to hopefully shield her from the night air; once that was done Amélie slowly stood, the effort of keeping her bad leg from crumpling made her stumble as she turned back towards the chateau. She could see the lights in the distance. Maybe two miles. She could make it. She _had_ to make it. She _couldn’t_ let Lena die out here. Her leg wouldn’t stop her. She gritted her teeth and ignored the pain as she forced her legs to carry her back down the hill, back to the footpath, back towards the chateau. Back to warmth and safety. If Lena died she couldn’t imagine life afterwards. _How could she live without Lena!?_ She couldn’t continue on without the wonderful, beautiful, perfect woman in her arms. If Lena died, Amélie was certain she would as well, both from guilt and from a broken heart.

Minutes felt like hours, and her leg slowed her down, and by the time she made it back to the warmth of her home she wasn’t sure if Lena was still breathing. She didn’t dare check. All other things were forgotten as she swept up the stairs with as much speed as she could muster, straight to her bedroom. The only bedroom with a hearth. The _warmest_ room in the chateau.

Lena was already so poorly dressed that Amélie had no trouble easing the white shirt and grass stained leggings off of her, something she had hoped she’d _never_ have to do again. She knew now, however, that Lena would understand. She would understand Amelie’s actions.

The fire was still going from earlier in the afternoon, but it would take time for its warmth to reach the small body on Amelie’s bed. A more direct source of warmth was needed, and needed _now_.

Amélie hated being touched. Lena was the only exception, and so the former dancer didn’t hesitate to begin removing her own clothes. Her fear and desperation made her clumsy, shaking hands struggling with the buttons on her shirt, but she persevered until she was able to tuck Lena into the large bed and curl herself around the smaller woman in nothing but their undergarments. Lena felt like _ice_ , her limbs having begin to stiffen from the cold. Her breaths were only just _barely_ there, but they were there. Her shivers hadn’t subsided. Amélie pressed herself as tightly to Lena’s back as she could, trying to provide her with as much heat as she could. _If Lena died_.... she tried her best to avoid thinking about it, instead focusing on gently tugging loose some of the leaves that had gotten tangled in Lena’s hair, and holding her even closer. She clasped Lena’s hands with her own and and gently rubbed them together, slowly warming them. She didn’t know if she could handle seeing Lena get sick again. Seeing her so _weak_ and _helpless_ made her heart shatter, but she preferred that to Lena dying there in her arms. Sleep didn’t come, for fear that Lena would _succumb_ while she slept. She felt exhausted and her leg was _burning_ , but she refused to sleep.

She didn’t get up from the bed until well into the morning, possibly past noon, when Lena finally began to show signs of life. Realizing that Lena would probably prefer being able to see her, Amélie got up just long enough to move around to the other side of the bed, to slip back under the thick blankets facing the smaller woman. She was still pale, her lips were more of a deep purpleish pink now, and she could see small red lines on her skin where she had run into branches. She looked even _worse_ than she had on the subway. When she made a small noise and her eyelids fluttered, Amélie gently drew Lena’s hands to her chest, then to her lips, pressing a tender kiss to each knuckle as Lena slowly pulled herself back from the realm of sleep. Any assumption or fear that Amélie was going to judge her or evict her vanished instantly when Lena’s amber eyes opened, dulled by _exhaustion_ both emotional and physical, and the first thing she saw was her friend gently kissing her bruised hands. Any reflexive apology died on her tongue when the former dancer’s eyes lifted, met hers and welled with hot, _stinging_ tears, eyes that told her _exactly_ how she felt without her speaking. She _melted_ into Amélie when the taller woman drew her close, the older woman beginning to sob as she buried her face in unruly blue hair. She didn’t need to say anything. Lena didn’t need her to. She understood exactly what she had done, albeit unintentionally, by running off. She knew that her fleeting worry that Amélie thought those things about her could have cost her their friendship, and her actions had very nearly cost her her _life_. Amélie was the _only_ reason she was alive. She had trekked for _hours_ to find her and brought her home despite how much pain she had to be in. That wasn’t something a person did unless they saw _value_. Amélie had to believe than Lena was worth something if she put so much effort into bringing her home and bringing her back to life.

“If you died I don’t know what I’d do.” Amelie tearfully mumbled into Lena’s hair as she held her even tighter. It was a sentence that was like a sucker punch to Lena’s gut. It was sincere and full of emotion and it made her heart _ache_ even more than it already did. Amélie was exhausted and didn’t try to hold back her thoughts as she continued to cradle Lena to her chest. She sounded so _weary_ and _drained_. “I don’t think I can keep going without you, Lena.” Another sucker punch that made Lena’s eyes _sting_ with tears. She nodded mutely against Amelie’s neck, not trusting her throat to speak after spending most of her run _screaming_ into the forest, letting out all of her insecurity and fears until she collapsed and couldn’t make another sound, her throat raw and _burning_. Every swallow was agony.

“Don’t ever leave me again, please....” came the soft, _desperate_ plea. Another nod and a soft choking sound as Lena began to cry too, one arm slipping around the former dancer’s chest to hug her as tightly as she could, trying to tell her she wasn’t going anywhere. She wasn’t going to leave her again. She wasn’t going to make her cry again.

Amélie pressed a trembling kiss to Lena’s forehead once the girl had fallen asleep, resolving to tell Lena _exactly_ how she felt the moment she woke up again. She wouldn’t let it be left unsaid, for better or worse.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I meant to post this one last night but some scammer tried to screw me over last night on steam. Funny thing is, I don't have fortnight or TF2. 
> 
> Anyways here. I'm sorry for the drama, but I needed to kick Amélie in the butt to get her ready to confess. 
> 
> Only a few more chapters, maybe two to go before this arc is over! 
> 
> Comments make me a happy potato! 
> 
> (Also who else wants Widow to have a special child harness ability for the enemy Tracer because I sure do.🤣)


	8. Warmth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amélie takes the leap. 
> 
> Or
> 
> No funny summary this time. Just me ugly gay crying as I proudly wrap this arc up.

  
Amélie woke up to bright morning light hitting her square in the face, and a warm body tucked against her chest. Not a bad way to wake up considering recent events. She slowly sat up, trying her best to avoid waking the snoring and slightly drooling perfection that was Lena. God, she was _drooling_ and Amélie still wanted to kiss her. _How was drooling so cute!?_

Lena showed no signs of waking up, so Amélie resolved to wait until she woke on her own before telling her. She had just spent almost twenty hours asleep, she desperately had to pee. And she _needed_ coffee. The burning in her leg would need an ice pack, and she may as well get a shower over with, along with breakfast.

Her normally short walk to the washroom was doubled by her leg, it wouldn’t even _support_ her after all the abuse she had put it through. She reminded herself to fetch the brace she had for especially bad days, before she slipped into the large bathroom.

A shower did _wonders_ , helping her dispel the last of the residual anxiety that had been lingering since Lena ran off. She was _safe_ and _warm_ , and she wasn’t going anywhere.

Despite ridding herself of the remaining stress, she inevitably replaced it with more _fretful_ thoughts as she worked shampoo into her hair. She couldn’t say it any other way but the honest one. She loved Lena. She was _in love_ with Lena. Her parents would scoff at just how quickly she had become smitten. In just over a month she was _hopelessly_ in love. Lena was a very _special_ woman. She had a cute, tomboyish charm and everything she did made Amélie want to either cry, take a picture, or just kiss the bluenette senseless. It had been getting harder and harder to keep herself from doing option three. She stepped out of the shower, wrapping herself in a towel and wringing the water out of her hair. It was so much longer than she realized. She had wanted to cut it at one point, much to Lena’s dismay. The girl quickly developed a fascination with her hair, and whenever she got the opportunity she played with it, braiding it until Amélie noticed and swatted her hands away good naturedly. It never made her stop, she started up again moments later. She had really only kept it so long because Lena loved it.

Lena was still asleep when Amélie fetched some soft, comfortable clothing, rolling over when Amélie entered but doing little else. She was _fine_. _Everything was fine._ Amélie got dressed in the bathroom, and she hobbled down to the kitchen to sate her need for coffee and food. She hadn’t eaten since before all of the drama, almost two days ago. Her stomach _clenched_ painfully at the reminder. She got the coffeemaker going and threw together something other than pancakes for once. She didn’t usually eat bacon, she found it too flavourful for an early meal, but today she felt it was necessary. One plate of bacon and scrambled eggs later, coffee drunk and dishes cleared away, she tucked what was left, a generous amount, into Tupperware containers to give to Lena when she got up. She slowly wiped the table down, balancing on one leg to avoid aggravating her injury.

 _Did Lena feel the same way?_ The thought had been plaguing her for weeks. Her greatest fear was that Lena didn’t feel the same way as she did. She had seen Lena’s behaviour slowly change the longer she had stayed at the chateau and had done her best to pretend she didn’t notice, while also trying to make sense of it. The shyness and reluctance to speak had given way to an outspoken and energetic woman. The way she looked at Amélie had changed _profoundly_. Brief, _timid_ glances grew longer, a _softness_ to her expression when she didn’t think the other woman was looking. Something close to _awe_. She didn’t want to assume she saw what looked like _genuine attraction_ there too. It had to be the cultural difference or something to that effect, Lena had to be merely interested in how differently they spoke and acted. The first time she saw Amélie let her hair down she nearly _inhaled_ her tea, which had been one of the first times Amélie seriously considered asking Lena out. Helping Lena as she coughed had taken priority, however, and by the time she had stopped Amélie was too _nervous_ to ask.

What changed the most was the need for contact. Lena had kept her hands to herself as best she could for all of two days after arriving. Once she started shyly initiating contact and found it to not be unwanted she became _noticeably_ more content. Hand holding and linking arms had turned into surprise hugs and Lena plopping herself down in the taller woman’s lap, curling up and joining her in whatever she was doing. All barriers simply vanished, and Amélie had done her best to not stoke the little flame of _hope_ and _attraction_ burning in her chest. Clearly she had _failed_. Her heart stuttered every time Lena was close, every hug and every time she cuddled close she felt like she was about to _combust_. When Lena admitted to her that she felt a lot _safer_ when she was close to Amélie, and she began relying on the former dancer for comfort, especially when she had one of her many moments of sadness or anxiety, Amélie felt like her heart was going to _explode_ from the amount of gratitude and affection she felt. The amount of times she wanted to blurt out everything, only to catch herself at the last second, was mounting. Eventually she would say something stupid and potentially ruin everything. She needed to do it _properly_ before that happened.

She finished wiping down the table and tossed the rag into the sink, slowly making her way to the closet where her brace was stashed away. It wasn’t anything big or bulky, it just provided enough support for her to avoid aggravating her injury. She had hoped to never use it again but the support was welcome nevertheless. She grabbed Lena’s hoodie off of the couch and padded back up the stairs, hesitating at the door to her bedroom. She had to do it now. No matter how scared she was, even if this one thing ruined it all, she had to do it.

_Woman up, Amélie._

She slowly took a deep breath, then she turned the doorknob and slipped into the bedroom, clutching the hoodie to her chest.

Lena, it seemed, had woken a while ago and had dragged herself into the shower, then to the fireplace. She had wrapped one of the thick blankets around her and was sitting with her eyes closed like she usually did after waking up. When Amélie entered and the door shut with a soft click, Lena sat up a little straighter, turning her head slightly. Amélie gingerly lowered herself to sit next to the smaller woman, who immediately leaned herself on the taller’s shoulder with a happy sigh. Amélie rested her head against damp blue spikes, briefly letting herself enjoy the moment. If Lena didn’t feel the same way, she doubted she would have many more moments like this. She wanted to enjoy it. A few minutes slowly passed before she finally spoke.

“Are you hungry, _ma belle_?” She spoke softly, and gently, smiling when Lena nodded against her shoulder but made no move to get up. She knew Amélie too well already. She knew that she didn’t have to get up on her own.

“Lazy girl.” The older woman teased, as she pulled Lena up, and went to fetch her one of the many oversized nightshirts Lena enjoyed wearing. If she didn’t have to wear proper clothes, she wouldn’t. Once Lena was “dressed” and finally forced her eyes open, she made a small noise of concern as she noticed the brace. She tried to voice her questions but all that came out was a _croak_. Her voice wouldn’t return fully for a few days after the screaming she had done. It was saddening, but it was also amusing to see her trying to convey her questions by gesturing to the brace, herself, the bed, then to Amélie with a helpless look on her face.

“We can rest once you’ve eaten, _Chérie_ , I don’t fancy the thought of you starving because you decided to sleep instead. Come. We can lie down after, and we can talk.”

Lena’s eyes _widened_ just a bit at the mention of speaking. Amélie never specifically asked to speak with her unless it was something important. Any other time they simply spoke and didn’t need to ask for one another to talk. Amélie did her best to overlook the concern and confusion in her eyes, the tiny glint of _fear_ that was always present when Amélie made such a request. She knew that the fear was always there, in the back of Lena’s mind, that Amélie had finally had enough of her and the talk was her eviction notice. It never came, but it remained in the back of her mind.

Lena, as expected, wolfed down everything Amélie had saved plus a few pancakes she made once Lena had finished, and for once she let Amélie sit her back down and take care of the cleanup herself, leaning her head on her hand and watching the taller woman move about the kitchen with half-closed eyes. She was well on her way back to sleep by the time Amélie finished.

“Lets go back upstairs, you look exhausted.”

Lena shook her head much to Amelie’s surprise, instead standing up with a distinct _wobble_ and reaching for the taller woman’s arm with a _pleading_ expression. Whatever she needed, Amélie provided. _Always_. She let Lena tug her into the sitting room, and let herself be sat down. “Are you alright Lena? Would you not prefer the bed?” She was curious and confused as Lena continued to push on her shoulder, and a bit concerned when Lena kept her eyes anywhere but on her. Amélie let herself be moved, after a moment’s hesitation, and ended up on her back, taking the cue to lift her legs up to rest lengthwise on the sofa.

“Lena...?” Her question trailed off when Lena just hovered for a moment, looking uncertain until Amélie realized what she wanted.

“Come here, _ma belle_.” She opened her arms and warmly smiled up at the smaller woman, who hesitated a moment longer before she clambered on top of her and settled down. They had never done this before. Lena usually preferred to curl up in Amelie’s lap or use her lap as a pillow. They had never had the chance to try this before. It felt nice, having Lena’s weight on her, and her head nestled under her jaw.

“Are you alright, _Chérie_? This is a bit different from what we usually do...”

She didn’t expect a reply, not a verbal one anyway. Lena was exhausted and probably just wanted to sleep. She wrapped her arms snugly around the smaller woman’s waist and pressed a gentle kiss into her messy hair. Lena wasn’t asleep, she could feel the tension in her body.

“Do you want to sleep first, or should we talk now?” Amélie softly inquired, and she felt a mixture of relief and dismay when Lena croaked out something that resembled, “talk.” She couldn’t delay it anymore.

She was prepared. She had everything that she wanted to say ready to go, yet here she was, hesitating out of _fear_.

_Just do it. Stop being a coward._

“Lena, you’ve noticed things changing since you came here, just as much as I have.”

Lena _stiffened_ noticeably, nodding against Amelie’s neck. Not a good first sign.

“We’re friends, Lena, and you will always be my most treasured friend, but I think we are both seeing something else now. I’ve seen the way you look at me when you think I don’t notice.”

A tiny shudder shook Lena’s shoulders and she let out something similar to a _sob_ at being caught. Amélie continued before she could protest, she needed to make her feelings known.

“It’s _alright_ , Lena. I’m not mad or disgusted. There is _nothing_ wrong with you and nothing wrong with liking other women.”

She felt Lena going still, she could practically hear the cogs in her head turning. It was now or never. Time to take the leap or back off and regret it forever.

“I’ve been looking at you too, Lena. I’m surprised you haven’t noticed.”

Lena was still for a brief moment before she began trying to talk again, but Amélie forced onwards out of sheer _panic_.

“You’re so bright and _beautiful_ , Lena. You’ve done what a year of counselling and therapy failed to do. You made me happy again. You make me feel loved and every time we hold hands I want to kiss you until you _can’t_ be unhappy anymore. You’ve filled a hole in my heart that I never knew was there. _I love you, Lena_. I just want you to know that, whatever you decide to do next.”

There it was. Everything laid out for the bluenette to see. Amélie had never felt more _terrified_ as she waited for Lena to respond. When Lena started to sit up she couldn’t look at her, blinking away tears as she looked away. Her brain was moving so quickly that she couldn’t think straight. What if she was wrong. What if she had been imagining things. What if Lena hated her now? What if she left? What if she was still with Emily? What if she just ruined that relationship!?

Once Amélie got into her thoughts she was seldom able to get out of them. Once she was this anxious very little could usually be done. Few things could bring her back to reality.

She learned quickly that a kiss was one of those very few things. Her brain came to a screeching halt when she felt something soft and warm press against her lips. She thought it was Lena’s hand at first, for god knows what reason, until she opened her eyes and found herself looking into Lena’s hazy, half closed eyes. Lena was kissing her. _Lena was kissing her and it was real._ This wasn’t her imagination.

The universe came to a standstill.

When Amélie didn’t immediately kiss her back Lena seemed to lose her nerve, sitting back up with a rather dejected look on her face. Amélie couldn’t let that expression remain on Lena’s face any longer and she moved, chasing after Lena and gently cupping the back of her head to guide her into another, more heartfelt kiss. Lena stiffened for just a moment, startled, but as Amélie gently rubbed her thumb against the back of her neck she relaxed into the kiss with a small _sob_ of relief, tangling one hand in Amelie’s hair as she lowered them both back to the couch.

This was happening. Amélie felt her heart _hammering_ in her chest as Lena briefly pulled back, and sighed blissfully before coming back for more. It was soft and tender, no tongue or teeth. Just reaffirming that they were both enjoying this. That they both felt the same way.

Lena didn’t have to say anything, but once they had settled down, Lena tucked back under Amelie’s chin, she still tried to.

“Love you too...” she had probably meant it to be heartfelt and genuine, but a long yawn interrupted her. She settled for nuzzling her nose into the crook of Amelie’s neck, making the older woman chuckle, and they lay in silence, basking in the warmth of their affection.

“As much as I would like to remain here, _ma belle_ , I cannot feel my legs anymore.”

Lena snorted against her neck, before slowly pushing herself up. She remained glued to Amelie’s side as they made their way upstairs, and she only moved out of reach to swipe her phone from the bedside table before curling against Amélie’s side again. She turned it on and began looking through it as the older woman watched, comfortably, _contentedly_.

“I want you to meet Emily.” Lena croaked.

The request was strange, but Amélie was too high on happiness and love to really be concerned. Lena had opened her photos and was cycling through some pictures for her. Mostly selfies but a few of them contained a second person. A lovely redhead with green eyes and even more freckles than Lena. The two of them smiling, eating at restaurants, walking at night, _kissing under a street lamp._ The images made her feel warm and she enjoyed seeing Lena so happy. _Jealousy_ didn’t even register.

Lena kept going despite the strain on her voice, “She’s my girlfriend. At least I _hope_ she still is. Haven’t been back for a while...” Lena explained glumly, “she wanted me to go and find something that I was missing. I love her to pieces but something was always missing. I didn’t know what it was till I woke up here.” She began to blush as she spoke, right to the tips of her ears. Amélie wanted to kiss them, kiss _Lena_ , but she waited for her to finish. Lena looked up and _shyly_ made eye contact, tears beginning to gather at the corners as she gave Amélie a trembling, lopsided grin.

“I didn’t realize it was a _person_.”

Amélie brushed Lena’s tears away even as she felt her own begin to roll down her cheeks, returning the smile affectionately as Lena let out a wet laugh.

“Me and Em always talked about it. Neither of us are strictly monogamous, we’ve both wanted to try bringing a third person in for a while. After my accident and everything I had to deal with we kind of gave up on it. I didn’t think I’d get lucky enough to meet another person who could love me the way Em does. Then you came crashing in and _kidnapped_ me out of nowhere and I couldn’t get over how bloody _gorgeous_ you are and how much you really seemed to care and when you started looking at me differently I felt like saying something but I was so scared and-“

Amélie cut off Lena’s babbling by gently pulling her down for a kiss, one which the bluenette melted into happily. When they parted Lena relaxed into her side and mumbled, “When I realized you felt something more I felt like that other part of me was full. All that was missing was Emily.” She buried her face against Amelie’s neck.

“I want you to _meet_ her.”

Amélie had never heard of nonmanogamy that wasn’t in some divorce on the news. She was surprised that it was a real thing. And she was even more surprised that she found the whole idea _fascinating_.

“When was the last time you called her, Lena?”

“Bout three months ago. Before I dyed my hair an’ everything.”

Amélie smiled at how odd it was that she had _never_ assumed Lena didn’t have blue hair naturally.

“Call her, _ma belle_. Tell her. And let her know that she is _welcome_ here, just like you are.”

Lena sat up with a look of awe and _disbelief_ as Amélie spoke, “Don’t look so surprised, Lena. I found out about Emily when I first washed your hoodie. The message on the tag is adorable. I’ve wanted to meet her for some time now.”

Lena swallowed thickly, looking from the former dancer to her phone as she processed what had just been said.

“Do you think she’ll be mad at me?” She said finally, sounding worried. Her voice trembled.

“She won’t be, Lena. She _loves_ you.”

After a few moments of uncertainty, Lena nodded, settling cross legged on the bed and opening her contacts app. Amélie sat up as well when Lena brought the phone to her ear and waited, worrying her lower lip with her teeth as the phone rang. She swallowed again when she heard the phone on the other end pick up, and Amélie could make out a voice on the other end.

“Hey Em....”

Silence, then the other person was exclaiming and asking questions that made Lena tear up again, _laughing_ as she wiped them away.

“I’m ok Em I promise. I just got in a dark place and got lost for a while. I found my way out though, with some help.”

She looked over at Amélie, who was smiling at her fondly and nodding at her in encouragement.

“I... I think I found them Em. I found the missing piece.”

Emily’s voice, though still too quiet to make out words for Amélie, voiced a question. Lena giggled hoarsely and replied, “Yeah, it’s a person. I want you to come meet her, Em. She’s _amazing_! She helped me get myself back, she’s done so much for me and we just had the talk. Yeah. _The talk_. She wants to meet you!”

Lena began gesturing enthusiastically as she spoke and Amélie watched her with a fond smile.

Everything was _perfect_.

_They were going to be fine._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is ladies and gentlemen. The end of this arc. There will be more, so don't worry. I still have to follow their story, meeting Emily, and Amélie slowly acclimating to the roller coaster that is Lena and their relationship. It'll have ups and downs but it isn't over. Not by a long shot. 
> 
> This was so emotional for me to work on, but it's worth it. 
> 
> Thank you all for sticking with me to the end, I'm so proud of this fic and I can't wait to bring y'all part 2!


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